By Chris Seiter

Published on August 28th, 2022

It is highly likely that if your ex girlfriend broke up with you, she is hurting and struggling same as you.  Now, the emotional reactions from each of you will be different in the sense that she initiated the breakup and you are probably left wondering what the heck happened.

So in that regard, her hurt is going to be different, particularly in the beginning.  It all may take awhile to play out. She will likely go through phases in which she feels freed and independent, like her old self.  Then she may swing to an emotional place where she feels lost, questioning all that has unfolded in her life.

While you may be immediately feeling deep sadness and perhaps shock from what what has happened. Your ex girlfriend on the other hand may feel justified to have taken the step to end the relationship.

Her coming to grips on what has actually happened may take longer and so in that respect she is likely to experience a different set of emotions and in a different order.

What Is Your Ex Girlfriend Feeling After She Breaks Up With You?

It is never a smooth transition after a couple experiences a breakup.  And if your ex girlfriend pulled the trigger and ended things, you are probably wondering what kind of feelings she is dealing with.  It usually revolves around five key emotional reactions.

1. On One Level Your Ex Girlfriend May Feel Relief

After the breakup has happened those feelings of dread she held on to dissolves. She has probably been thinking of breaking up for some time, fussing over when and how to do it.  This causes a lot of internal stress in her.

So in that regard, the first few hours or days after a breakup can be filled with a sense of relief.  She may even feel a little giddy and proud of herself for ending things.

Chances are that the decision was not easy and she probably spent a lot of time dwelling over whether she should break up with you.  But once she gets past all of that and goes ahead with her intention of ending the relationship, it is natural for her to feel the pressure is off.

Her mind will go to other things and she will start thinking about the near future being more fulfilling and happier. She will start spending more time with her friends.

Again, this is a natural reaction to all of the pent up feelings.  Indeed, she may have despaired over having to tell you it’s all over.

2. Your Ex Will Likely Experience a Sense of Freedom

Now with you cast aside, so she thinks, she may feel she is freed up to do what she wants.  She may harbor notions of possibly dating others, though more often than not, acting on that is easier said (to one’s self) than done.

Her sense of freedom from being split away from her ex boyfriend may give her some deluded feelings of happiness.  But later she will discover that feelings can be hard to peg and what she thinks she wants, may not be what she really desires down the road.

But in those early days, feeling free and empowered will be feelings that she will experience.

3. Later She May Start to Question If She Made the Right Decision To Leave You

As reality starts to set in your ex girlfriend may start to question if she really did the right thing.  Invariably, since the two of you were once bonded tightly together, she will naturally start to miss those fulfilling experiences the two of your experienced together.

All of the early positive feelings she may have experienced soon after the break up with you more often than not gives way to the realization that she may have acted too impulsively.

Don’t be surprised if she starts reaching out to you on the pretense of a friendly gesture.  There may be much more behind her efforts.

4. Your Ex Girlfriend May Even Feel Regret

As times goes by, particularly if you initiated the No Contact period, your ex girlfriend may feel a lot of regret for how things unfolded.  There could be a lot of second guessing on her end to the extent that she may want to meet up with you to discuss what happened.

These feelings of regret can also be somewhat elusive.  She may feel uncertain inside, but not show it in any clear what.  Unfortunately this can create a somewhat confusing environment whereas she may be entertaining getting back with you, but may also be sending you other signals.

This kind of confusion can be caused by her uncertainty or possibly her pride.  Either case, at its core, regret is a powerful emotion and can linger a long time and influence your ex girlfriend in many ways.

5. In Some Circumstances Your Ex Will Go Into Denial

Often an ex will mask their pain and go into denial.  Rest assured, few people escape the pain of a breakup.  So yes, you can bet she is very likely hurting in many of the same ways you feel the pain.

It is easy for us all to fall victim to our own delusions.  On one hand she may convince herself all of this is for the best.  Later, in the same day, she may plunge into a depressive state wondering if the breakup is the right thing to do.  Back and forth these feelings will move through her mind as she seek to find peace.  You too might struggle with the same thoughts.

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From a distance, it may look like she is fickle and doesn’t know what she wants.  But the truth is that your ex girlfriend is as much negatively impacted by the falling out as you are.

Your Ex Girlfriend May Have Initiated The Breakup But It Ain’t Over Yet!

So don’t throw in the towel just because your ex initiated the breakup leaving you in a complete funk.

The odds are that somewhere down the line, your ex girlfriend is going to meet up with the reality of not having you in her life in all the way she enjoyed.

Eventually she will face the music and realize that ending things is not so simple and no one, no matter how strong they think they are, can escape the emotional roller coaster that is awaiting them after a falling out.

Know this as the truth of how complex our emotions can be when it comes to relationships with the opposite sex.

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