Sometimes a client will reach out to me asking if I think his ex-girlfriend is sick and fed up with him. Of course, I will ask him why he thinks this and he will describe various things that have been said and that have happened which on the surface would seem to support the conclusion that his ex is tired of dealing with him and the breakup.
Undoubtedly, these situations in which you fear your ex girlfriend is exhausted with dealing with you are often far more complicated. Remember, following a breakup, feelings are raw and how you behave and how that might cause her to say things about your behavior is a vast, emotional landscape.
But first things first. Let me answer this question that brings you to this post. Then I will offer you up the top 9 clues or signs that may tell you that your ex-girlfriend has reached her limit with you. Along the way, I will offer you suggestions on how you can turn around this unflattering image she has of you.
Here is your short answer:
Your ex girlfriend in the early days following the breakup may very well be sick of you and and everything she is dealing with, but it doesn’t mean the relationship has turned toxic and that your chances are doomed. It most often means your ex has reached an emotional limit and it’s time for you to pull back.
What Are the Signs That Your Ex is Sick of You and Doesn’t Want To Be Reminded of You?
To be sure, an ex-girlfriend being sick of you is different than her being mad at you. She can have both emotions for different reasons, but today we are concentrating more on the former (i.e. fed up with you as her boyfriend) and will discuss what drives anger in another post.
So let’s get right into it. Here are the top 9 signs or clues as to why your ex is beyond being frustrated with you.
1. She Tells You So To Your Face
It is rather obvious when your ex-girlfriend is so fed up with you that she lets you have it straight to your face.
Now I know this can be upsetting when it’s happening and later when you think about it. But know that when emotions cease the moment, a lot of the things your ex is telling you are injected with anger and agitation. So try to let it go. Take it for what it is which is essentially her letting off some steam.
It doesn’t necessarily mean that the entire relationship is doomed. It’s just in that moment, your girlfriend doesn’t want to be dealing with you and your presence is reminding her of a lot of negative things.
2. Your Ex Girlfriend Gets Others To Tell You to Back Off
Another telltale sign that your ex-girlfriend doesn’t want to deal with you in the least is she gets one of her friends to tell you to leave her alone. This approach by her is as much for her as it is for you. She may be very depressed about the state of the relationship and just can’t bring herself to see or talk to you so she get’s someone else to intervene.
Or it is possible your ex doesn’t entirely trust herself with you so she wants another layer between you and herself. Hence, she gets somebody she trusts to tell you to give her some space.
3. She Blocks You Everywhere
You might also find that you are blocked everywhere on social media.
All those days when you felt connected to her by checking in on Facebook, Instagram, or any of the other countless social media platforms could be interrupted because she has you blocked in every manner she is allowed to.
Now at first glance, you may think that this must surely be the end of it all. But trust me, it is not necessarily so. Just because you are blocked everywhere doesn’t mean your chances have been reduced to zero.
Consider that she chose this approach to protect herself from thinking about you. Or perhaps she read it somewhere or was told by someone that this is a good thing to do.
4. Your Ex Initiates No Contact
It is usually a clear sign that your ex-girlfriend doesn’t want to be around you when she shuts down all communications. Yes, she may be sick of thinking and dealing with you in the moment she decides to do this. But her implementing no contact is not necessarily the end of all things.
In fact, it can be a healthy release from whatever pent up emotions are driving both of you to what must feel like the edge of insanity.
5. She Withdraws and Wants to Be Alone
Perhaps the two of you are still communicating in some small ways, but you can tell she is withdrawing from you and wants to be by herself. Now it is very possible your presence is making her feel bad and she may be sick of dealing with it. Perhaps things got to a place where her desire to be alone is a defense mechanism.
But again, even in healthy relationships, two people can cause the other to be fed up and tired of arguing about everything or worrying about when the next fight will unfold.
Sometimes we need a break and this may be what is going on with your ex. She is looking for an escape.
6. She Often Changes her Mind or Cancels Out On You
Another sign that your ex is losing her patience with you and is growing more weary of dealing with you is she is beginning to cancel out on things the two of you planned.
This could be the beginning of the relationship going sour, so to speak. Maybe at this juncture your ex girlfriend is not literally sick of you, but it is possible her feelings are changing and moving slowly in another direction.
7. She Puts The Word Out to Family and Friends to Avoid You
If you are getting the cold shoulder from your ex girlfriend’s family or friends , then that is probably a surefire sign that your ex is at her wits end.
She has put out the message to those dearest to her that you are no longer in her circle of friends. If she isn’t sick of dealing with you yet, she will soon be if you continue to press.
As mentioned earlier, there is a time for you to pull back and realize that your actions and attempted interventions are having the opposite effect. Instead of drawing her closer, you are likely antagonizing her.
Unfortunately, if you are obsessed with making things work, you may discover very late that your ill fated actions made things worse.
If her family and friends are pulling back from you, don’t persist.
Pull back yourself and allow time for things to cool down before you take any further actions.
8. Many Weeks or Months Go By Without Her Opening Up To You
Another way you can tell that your ex-girlfriend is slowly growing sick of the whole relationship is that a lot of time goes by without her really connecting with you in a meaningful way.
Perhaps she is not sickened by your sight, but something is not right if she is continuing to pull away.
This could be a sign of other problems looming on the horizon. Another fight could be near which could easily morph into a deeper decline.
9. She Ridicules You To Friends or on Social Media
Sadly, one of the worst signs that your ex girlfriend is sickened to be around you or even think of you is that you become a butt of her jokes.
You might hear through the grapevine that she is saying a lot of horrible things about you. Whether they be true, half truths, or complete lies, the reality is that the mutual trust and respect has disintegrated to such a level that she feels empowered to ridicule you among mutual friends or on social media.
Could this be a desperate attempt at attention?
Or is this a product of her showing her true feelings in a classless way?
Relationships are complicated and the ebbs and flows they experience can produce many sad outcomes. At times, it may feel hopeless, particularly if you are the victim of a sick joke. Maybe she is in a very bad place emotionally. Or perhaps you have discovered something about her you wish you had known much earlier on.
Whatever the true circumstance, just know that the journey ahead of you has the potential of bringing you peace in your life if you truly put everything in its proper perspective.