By Chris Seiter

Updated on June 6th, 2022

It is a pretty lousy feeling when your girlfriend either tells you she doesn’t want to see you any longer or leaves you all kinds of clues that seeing you again is out of the question.

So what do you do?  Well, let me give you the quick answer on how you navigate girlfriend troubles when she turns against you and doesn’t want to see you any longer.

The first thing you need to know is not to push it with your girlfriend.  If you try to force yourself on seeing your girlfriend or ex girlfriend then she is going to pull away.  It is better to stand back from the situation. Give her some space and avoid pressing her for reasons.

Why Does Your Ex Girlfriend Want to Stop Seeing You?

First let’s explore the different reasons and causes for why your girlfriend doesn’t want to be around you anymore.  If you discover that some of the reasons apply to your situation, then keep reading because I am going to offer you a plan on what you can do to turn your girlfriend troubles around.

Reason One:  She Has Been Hiding Her Discontent for a Long Time

Perhaps one of the reasons why your girlfriend is pulling out of the relationship is because she has not been happy for a long time.  The core of any relationship will of course involve some give and take.  And a couple will go through some tough times.

But in some relationships the trust erodes or the connection gets severed due to a big concern.  It can be a significant thing that happened which caused the break.  Or it can be a number of issues that have piled up upon each other to finally cause your girlfriend to slowly become disenchanted with the way things are going.

Reason Two:  She is Mad at You For Something You Did

Another reason why your girlfriend is pulling away is because you did something that completely fractured the bond.  It could be that you cheated.  It could be money problems. It could be that she finally arrived at the conclusion that you are not the right guy for her.

But usually when she suddenly wants to stop seeing you it’s due to a singular event that tipped her over to the place in her mind that this relationship is not working.

Reason Three:  She Found Someone Else She Thinks She Likes More

Sometimes a girlfriend is poised to end things because she met someone else.  As heartbreaking as it can be to feel like you are on the short end of her love, it is not a complete disaster. Why?  Because your belief that she met someone she love more than you is sometimes misguided. Even if she tells you outright that this is the case, it can often turn out that your girlfriend doesn’t truly know her heart.

The “other guy” in her life may give her some initial excitement and you may feel that your chances of recovery are doomed. But you should realize that relationships and feelings are complicated and just because she expresses that she feels a certain way about someone else, does’t necessarily translate to the end of things.

Reason Four: She is Not Sure What She Wants

It is also not unusual for a girlfriend to say she needs space and to act like she doesn’t want to see or be around you if she is going through a period of uncertainty.  Now, these kind of feelings she may be expressing don’t  usually just emerge from nothing or completely out of the blue.

There could be some relationship challenges that the two of you have been undergoing which have culminated in her telling you she is not sure what she wants.  This kind of confusion is not rare due to the complexity of how people interact.

Indeed, often when your girlfriend gets to this place where she is exhibiting this kind of fickleness, it not a harbinger of worse things to come; at least not if you know how to handle things and steer the relationship back onto its tracks.

Reason Five: She is Testing Your Love

Lastly, one of the most common reasons why it seems your girlfriend is not wanting to be with you is because she actually does….but she is testing your love.  I know it sounds silly and illogical to hear that your girlfriend actually wants to be with you when everything she is doing suggests she wants to leave.

But if you find yourself in such a predicament, just know that it can be due the psychology of how your girlfriend is approaching a big question in her mind.

In other words, she may actually be very interested in completely investing herself into the relationship but before she does so she wants to know deep inside that you are equally invested. So in a way, she wants to see how invested you are and how hard you are willing to work to prove you are in it for the long haul.

It may feel like she has everything backwards in her approach, but such can be the case if your girlfriend needs to be sure you are the right guy.  She wants you to fight for her even at the risk of upsetting you.

What Can You Do To Help Make Your Girlfriend Want To Be With You Again?

So if you find yourself in a situation where your girlfriend is acting like she doesn’t want you around, then you need to take some measures to reverse this trend.  Here is a 4 Step Plan you can implement at the first clear signs that she isn’t interested in you being in her life.

1. Don’t Overstep and Cling

Too often guys will get panicky and act in the opposite way as they should. They may feel the attachment with their girlfriend dissolving away and try to grab and cling on to it, even over her objections.  This kind of behavior only reinforces her desire to get away from you.

It is a losing strategy to chase after a girlfriend who is giving you clear, telltale signs that she is not interested. You will only make it harder for yourself in the long run.

2. Give Your Girlfriend a Dose of What She Wants

So if your girlfriend is pulling away, then oblige her.  Give her plenty of space.  She just might discover that what she thought she wanted is far from what she needs.

What Are Your Chances of Getting Your Ex Girlfriend Back?

Take the quiz

Now here is an important consideration in how you implement this approach.  You don’t want to be a dick about this.  Don’t start a fight about her pulling away and throw at her every complaint you have in mind.  This only gives her more reasons to draw further away from you.

Use a bit of reverse psychology and tell her you are sorry she feels this way and that while you feel differently, perhaps it’s better for there to be a temporary divide.  Encourage her to take the time to explore what she feels she needs.  Tell her you will do the same.

It is a possible that when she get this freedom of being alone and single, she may discover it is better to return to you and work through whatever concerns she has about things.

3. Rebuild Your Attraction Profile

So while you and your girlfriend are separated, you need to work on your own attraction profile.

You will feel a lot better about yourself and it will help you work through some of the pain if you can highlight to the world that you offer a lot.

Meanwhile, while you may have thought your girlfriend was through with you, it is seldom the case.

In her own way, she will be keeping tabs on you and will notice some of these things your are doing to look and be more attractive in all the ways that connects with her own needs.

It may take her some time to make the connections, but those things that you do to raise your attraction profile will live on in her in small ways and over time, add up.

4. Make Your Move After the Appropriate Amount of Time Has Gone By

As time goes by and you have done the things to show your girlfriend that you actually have a lot on the ball, you may find an entry point to test the waters of where your girlfriend’s head is.

Remember, if you give her space and allow her time to explore what she really feels for you, the chances are good that eventually she will get there….you will create an opportunity for yourself to re-attract your girlfriend.

Usually, all of the time you spent with her did not go unnoticed.  Those experiences you had together likely helped toward creating a bond that has the potential of reattaching.  If those special moments with her were frequent enough, they will help open her up to you, even if it’s a slow process.

All of this can get moved along in a better way if you take the right approach in re-establishing the connection with your girlfriend.	

Related Articles