It’s awful tough when you are trying to get back with your ex girlfriend and she keeps bringing up the past.
Certainly we all can learn from our past mistakes, but when your ex girlfriend makes it a habit to constantly bring up your past mistakes it can short circuit your efforts to win her back.
And it may not be something you said or did with her.
For example, your ex may be hung up on someone you use to date and somehow that gets thrown up in your face.
Maybe she suspects you are back with your old flame. Or perhaps the jealousy bug has bitten her and she won’t let go of the past.
She may dwell on the past experiences you had with her, questioning your every motive. Or it could be something as simple as some bad fights the two of you had where you were not at your best.
Whatever the case, don’t be surprised if every negative thing that happened gets dragged into the conversation.
After all, when a breakup has occurred, it’s open season, right?
Well, really it shouldn’t be, but it can feel that way.
It’s Not Always The Bad Stuff Your Ex Girlfriend Will Conjure Up
But it’s not always about your ex girlfriend bringing up bad memories.
It can be something that the two of you had together that was very special and very positive. You may find her reminiscing about it.
She may be using these fond memories of the past to try and find her way back to you.
Or it could be both.
One moment your ex is thinking about all the good times you had together. The next moment she cites your past behavior as reason for why the two of you will never be a successful couple.
It’s tough when you catch it coming and going.
That is why it helps to have an ex recovery program like Ex Girlfriend Recovery Pro.
5 Reasons Why Your Ex Girlfriend Won’t Forget Your Past Mistakes
1. Following a Breakup Her Immediate Thoughts Will Go To All The Negative Things You Did
It’s tough to deal with the aftermath of a breakup because most of what unfolds is negativity.
You both feel bad for the same or different reasons and the chances of ugliness getting stirred up again is high.
The things she thinks you did in the past, which she believes were wrong, will likely get brought up – over and over again.
A part of her is going to try and justify her reasoning for agreeing to a breakup.
So invariably she will focus on the bad stuff she thinks you did.
Every mistake you may have made will get amplified.
2. You Might Just Have Gotten Caught Up With a Mean and Spiteful Ex Girlfriend
I sure hope this is not the case for you, but unfortunately your ex may be fueled by some deep seeded resentments.
It doesn’t take much for these angry thoughts to emerge.
Maybe you entered into the relationship and while part of you realized it was not the best of matches, you tried to make the most of it.
But then things may have gone bad – taking a turn for the worse.
Just maybe your ex is not the most understanding or kind person.
So when things get sideways and a breakup ensues, the gloves come off and she bombards you with every negative thing she can muster.
Now it’s possible she is just temperamental and the outbursts will subside.
But if your ex continues to pound away at everything you are (or are not), perhaps the breakup was the best thing for you both.
3. Your Ex Is Trying To Help You In The Long Run or Is She Simply Unhappy
Perhaps this may sound completely off, but sometimes a guy just has a hard time seeing that sometimes he behaves badly.
In the long run, this can make your girlfriend unhappy.
It’s not always easy to find fault with your our own actions.
We would rather blame the problems on something else. Taking full responsibility for your own shortcomings and doing something about it is usually the exception than the rule, particularly early on in the breakup period.
At that stage we are usually in self protection mode.
But sometimes what you might need is a true course in tough love. Maybe she is unhappy and is giving you some tough love. You just have to pay attention.
Listen to what she says about the past. Really listen.
And after reflection, if you decide there are some things you need to work on, then acknowledge it. Work on it.
4. Could This Be a Case Where You Are Playing Victim?
While this happens less than some of the other factors, it is possible you have fallen prey to playing victim.
Now, I am not saying your ex is perfect in all her ways.
But some people complain far too often.
It can be an easy way of excusing oneself if you turn to everyone you know (including yourself) and insist you did nothing wrong. That it was all “her” fault (you might think).
But it almost always takes two to bring a relationship to a point of break up.
So if you find your ex girlfriend constantly pointing to your mistakes, it could be because she doesn’t think you take them seriously.
5. Your Ex Girlfriend Is Being Influenced By Others – She Has Been Brainwashed!
Another reason why your ex is harping on the past is because someone (like a friend or family member) has gotten inside her head.
The post breakup period can be confusing and your ex could be in a vulnerable state.
Sometimes the worst advice she can get is from her friends or family.
Naturally they will take her side and may insert their own negative biases and opinions about you. This can cause her to become convinced you are a monster, when nothing of the sort is true.
With each passing day, you may get portrayed in the most negative of ways, causing your ex girlfriend to become somewhat brainwashed which contributes to her overly focusing on just the negative memories.
Somewhere along the way, all the positives that made the relationship work can get lost.
But you are not alone in all this. What is important is having a sensible ex recovery plan to help you down the road.