By Chris Seiter

Published on December 11th, 2023

Alright, so you’re scrolling through your socials, minding your own business, and bam – another friend request from your ex-girlfriend. It’s like the fifth one this month. You’re probably thinking, “What’s up with that?”

Here is my answer:

Your ex-girlfriend might keep sending friend requests due to various reasons, such as wanting to maintain a connection, curiosity about your life, seeking closure, or even unresolved feelings. It’s important to assess your comfort with reconnecting and the impact it may have on your emotional well-being before you decide to respond to your Ex’s friend requests.

But there is always more to the story, right?  So let’s dive into all the various reasons why your ex might be hitting that friend request button repeatedly and how you should handle this digital dilemma.

What Are Your Chances of Getting Your Ex Girlfriend Back?

Take the quiz

Why Your Ex Might Keep Sending You Friend Requests?

  1. Looking for Closure: Sometimes, after a breakup, people are left with unresolved feelings or questions. She might be reaching out to find some closure or understanding about why things ended.
  2. Misses the Connection: It’s possible that she genuinely misses having you in her life. Friend requests could be her way of trying to maintain some form of connection, even if it’s just digital.
  3. Curiosity: Let’s face it – we all get curious about what our exes are up to. She might be sending these requests to peek into your life, see how you’re doing, and what’s new with you.
  4. Habit: If you were close and constantly interacted online, it might be a hard habit to break. Sending friend requests could be more reflexive than intentional.
  5. Regret and Reconsideration: Maybe she’s rethinking the breakup. These requests might be her testing the waters to see if there’s still a possibility of rekindling things.
  6. Accidental or Intentional: Accidentally sending a friend request is totally a thing (especially if she’s stalking your profile – not cool but happens). Or, it might be a deliberate move to get your attention.

What Should You Do If Your Ex Sends You a Request?

  1. Reflect on Your Feelings: First off, figure out how you feel about her reaching out. Are you over the breakup, or does this stir up some old feelings? Have you completed a No Contact period?  Your response should align with where you’re at emotionally and Game Plan wise.
  2. To Accept or Not to Accept: If you’re comfortable with her being a part of your social media circle and it doesn’t affect your well-being, accepting the request could be okay. But if it’s going to mess with your head or heart or your Game Plan, it might be better to hit decline.  If you are not sure, talk to one of our Breakup Coaches.
  3. Set Boundaries: If you decide to accept her requests, set clear boundaries about what kind of interaction is okay. If you don’t want late-night chats or a barrage of comments on your posts, make that clear.
  4. Communicate: If her constant requests are confusing or bothersome, it might be worth having a straightforward conversation about it. A simple, “Hey, I noticed you’ve sent a few friend requests, what’s up with that?” can open up a dialogue.

What You Shouldn’t Do?

  1. Don’t Play Games: If you’re accepting her requests just to snoop or make her jealous with your posts, it’s not healthy for either of you. Keep it real.
  2. Avoid the Impulse Block: Resist the urge to impulsively block her unless her actions are truly invasive or harmful. Sometimes, a simple conversation or politely declining the request can suffice.
  3. Don’t Overthink It: Spending hours analyzing why she sent the request and what it means can drive you nuts. Take it at face value and don’t delve too deep into the ‘what ifs’.
  4. Don’t Lead Her On: If you know you don’t want anything to do with her, don’t accept the request out of pity or guilt. It’s not fair to either of you.


When faced with the recurring dilemma of your ex-girlfriend sending you friend requests, it’s crucial to pause and evaluate your feelings and the potential impact of re-establishing this digital connection. Navigating your social media landscape can often feel as intricate as managing your real-life interactions.

Your online space is a reflection of your world, and you have the full authority to manage who has access to it. Decisions regarding who you allow in this space should be made with your mental and emotional health in mind.

As you contemplate your response, whether it’s accepting, declining, or initiating a conversation to clear the air, it’s essential to approach the situation with a level of maturity and introspection. Your decision should not only resonate with your current emotional state but also support your path to healing and personal growth. It’s about finding a balance between closure, moving on, and maintaining a healthy online environment.

Moreover, don’t underestimate the value of seeking external perspectives. A chat with close friends, family members, or even a professional counselor can provide fresh insights and help you navigate these complex digital-social dynamics. They can offer a sounding board for your thoughts and emotions, helping you to make a decision that’s best for you.

In this digital era, where online interactions can have a profound impact on our real-life emotions and relationships, being thoughtful and deliberate about how you manage these interactions is more important than ever.

The Expert’s Corner: 11 FAQs on Handling Ex-Girlfriend’s Friend Requests

  1. Why does my ex-girlfriend keep sending me friend requests?
    • It could be for various reasons, like curiosity, seeking closure, or even rekindling feelings. She might also do it impulsively, without a deeper motive.
  2. Should I accept her friend request?
    • This depends on your comfort level and current emotional state. If you feel it won’t affect your well-being and you’re curious or open to communicating, you can accept. If it brings negative emotions, it’s okay to decline.
  3. What does it mean if she constantly sends requests even after I decline?
    • Persistent requests could indicate she’s seeking attention or connection. It could be a sign of her struggling to let go or wanting to maintain some form of relationship.  It may be best to ignore these unhealthy stream of requests.
  4. How should I respond if I don’t want to accept her requests?
    • You can ignore the request if you prefer not to confront the situation. If you feel it’s necessary, a brief message explaining your need for space can be sent, but it’s not obligatory.
  5. Could accepting her friend request lead to miscommunication?
    • Yes, it could send mixed signals, especially if one of you still has romantic feelings. Clear communication about your intentions is important if you decide to stay connected online.
  6. Is it okay to ask her why she’s sending me friend requests?
    • If you’re comfortable and curious, you can ask her in a non-confrontational manner. However, be prepared for any response, or none at all.
  7. What if seeing her posts and updates makes me uncomfortable?
    • If her online presence affects you negatively, it’s best to either unfollow or unfriend her. Protecting your emotional health should be a priority.
  8. Should I block her if she continues to send requests?
    • If her actions feel intrusive and you’ve already declined her requests or asked her to stop, blocking is an option to consider for your peace of mind.
  9. How can I move on if we’re still connected online?
    • Moving on while staying connected online requires emotional detachment. Focus on your life and growth. If staying connected hinders this, reconsider the online connection.
  10. What does it mean for our past relationship if she wants to be friends online?
    • Wanting to be friends online doesn’t necessarily change the past. It could mean she values your past connection and wants to transition to friendship, or it could simply be a way of keeping tabs on each other.
  11. Can we rebuild our relationship starting from online friendship?
    • While it’s possible, it’s important not to have expectations. An online friendship can be quite different from a real-life relationship, and it’s crucial to differentiate between genuine connection and mere online presence.	

Related Articles