My Ex Girlfriend Is Never Coming Back… Is She Happier Without Me?

Life is funny, isn’t it.  Sometimes, when you least expect, something just drops on you like a ton of bricks.

Like your ex gf calling it quits with you.

Well, actually its not so funny if your ex gf tells you it’s over and she is not coming back.  Perhaps it was the last fight that you had with your girlfriend that put things over the top.

Perhaps she finally had enough of all the drama and conflict and wants to go try somewhere else in her search for love.

Maybe your ex gf doesn’t know what the hell she wants and is incredibly confused and you are getting dragged through this chaos.

Maybe just one day, out of the blue, your ex gf tells you she thinks you both would be happier without each other. She wants to try breaking up and see where that takes the two of you.

That one hurts.  It’s hard to even know how and what to feel when you hear something like that from your girlfriend.

I can see it now.  She walks up to you and says something like, “It’s not working for either one of us so let’s just take a timeout from each other”.

Now what the heck is that suppose to mean, you ask yourself.  A “timeout”?  It’s sorta your ex girlfriend’s way of telling you she wants to move on.

It’s her way of leaving you in the dust you come to later believe.

Perhaps so.  Then again, perhaps there is a lot more going on with your ex gf underneath the surface and you just haven’t figure it out yet.  Maybe your girlfriend hasn’t figured it out yet.

My Ex Girlfriend Has Me All Screwed Up

So you think to yourself, “is my ex gf really happy without me“.

Coming to believe such a thing can be a pretty difficult hurdle for a guy.  It’s quite a blow to the ego.

Here you have before you a beautiful girl who was once all yours.  She is a woman who you have made love to and has whispered in your ear how much she loves you.

Now you look about and she is walking out of your life.

It is not like your ex gf just upped and quietly vanished from your day to day interactions.

Nope.

It’s worse than that.

In this case, you ex gf has told you she is never coming back and guess what?

You never saw it coming.  You never saw the signs of your ex girlfriend wanting to just end things.

You are left wondering, “what the frack just happened?

If you are like a lot of guys, you probably never saw any of the signs that your ex gf was going to say adios, I am off to new adventures.

Well, OK, she probably didn’t say it that way.

It’s more likely she was sorta nice about it and took the path of not making a big scene and saying good stuff about you.  But the bottom line is she wants to move on, without you.

Ouch.

Getting Back on the Horse

Then again, perhaps this whole thing with your ex gf went down really bad.  Maybe she told you she met someone else.

Oh god, the dreaded, “I met someone else” line.

And guess what, don’t waste your time trying to pry that information out of your ex girlfriend, because she is not going to give him up.

But you know, the reality is that most girls don’t tell you about the other guy she has met. Let’s say a Mr. Prince Charming has caught her eye and apparently has gotten her all worked up.  But she probably doesn’t want you to feel any worse by telling you it’s another guy that has gotten between you and her.

So you probably may never know what is really going on.  Guys are not so good at reading the signs that women give off when trouble with the relationship is brewing.

Sure, sometimes it is obvious if you both are fighting all of the time are have had a lot of ups and downs.  Perhaps there has been many occasions  in the past where the two of you almost split up.

But don’t be surprised if you find yourself you in the dark.  Your ex gf may have been really good at hiding her true feelings, only letting them out in little spurts here and there.  Meanwhile, you are busy with other things going on and comfortable in the conviction that she is madly in love with you.

That is why breakups hurt so much.  We don’t see them coming because we don’t want to see them coming.

So when she says she wants out, you are left with this bewildered expression on your face.

And if you are feeling bad about it all, you will most certainly have these negative thoughts flashing through your mind during and after the whole breakup scene.

It is kinda like an unbelievable scene from a movie, you think to yourself.  When it is happening, when you are in that moment in which your ex gf is uttering those words you so much don’t want to hear, it seems almost surreal.

If she didn’t repeat what she said and start crying, you probably would have thought it was some terrible dream or god awful joke.

Did Your Ex Girlfriend Turn You Into An Emotional Mess

So for days and maybe weeks, you become a victim of the the Breakup Thoughts

This is when you are overcome with sad and almost desperate thoughts about her and the times before the breakup. You wonder what will happen now that she has issued you your waking papers.

These are thoughts where you might beat yourself up.  Thoughts were you might lash out at your ex gf because after all, resentment is brewing.  Thoughts like…

Will my ex gf ever come around to see me again?

My ex girlfirend says she is happier for it to be over so I guess I must have really screwed this up.

My ex gf seems so happy with her rebound guy.

You might ask yourself, why does she keep telling me how happy she is?

Is this some cruel parting shot at you?

Or is she truly happy and since she still has some feelings for you, simply wants to share?

Well if that’s it, you sure don’t want to hear about it.

Why isn’t your ex gf miserable like you?

You feel like crap, why doesn’t she feel bad about everything?

How Do I Swing This Back To My Favor?

When you hear her tell you things about how happy she is or you deduce it from seeing her Facebook Page or talking with her friends, it just sends a shiver down your spine.

The gall that she has to just carry on like this, you think to yourself.

For a moment, you become convinced your ex girlfriend must be some kind of cold hearted species from another world.  Maybe deep down she really hates guys, you think to yourself.   Yeah, maybe your ex gf has some kind of hangup with men and can’t be trusted in a relationship because she runs away when things really start going well.  You are living proof of it, right?

Well, it can be comforting to think this way for awhile, but it probably isn’t true.

In most cases you will eventually come to realize your ex girlfriend is suffering just like you.  It’s just not apparent because if you do catch her glance or hear something about her, it will only represent a small fraction of her emotional expression.

But it will be hard to let go of this feeling that your ex gf did you wrong.

I mean, Jesus Christ, what is the frack wrong with her, you might exclaim to yourself.

I have been good to her.

Maybe you were.

Then again, maybe there is a lot more to this love story that you don’t fully understand because you are reading it from your own viewpoint.

You cannot climb into her mind.

I Am Mad As Hell at My Ex Girlfriend

No matter how it all went down, you will be angry at your ex gf.

You will be mad at everything.

Mad at yourself for not seeing the signs that she was unhappy.

Mad at her for giving up and not working through the problems, like you wanted to.

No matter what you said to her, it was like your girlfriend’s mind was fixed and there was no going back.  You had no control.  She had all the personal power and she just ended it on her terms.  That makes you mad.

You might even be livid if you have been told or suspect there is another guy involved in this whole relationship equation.  Yep, that will really get you pissed.

And I know you don’t want to hear it, but that is the way things work in the world of finding love and making a meaningful connection.

It can be a tenuous thing when you first explore it.   Trust can grow and make things better.  But as we spend more time together with someone, we may discover that compatibility is not optimal.   One has to try to learn what works for them when it comes to matters of the heart.  Sometimes you are unsure.  Sometimes you lack context and perspective.  So naturally, it is not unusual when guys and gals explore their complicated feelings for others.

Maybe on some level you can understand this, but odds are that you won’t, at least not right now if the breakup with your ex gf is still fresh in your mind.

You will find yourself recycling more angry thoughts.

You think to yourself, what kind of person just tells you flat out that she doesn’t want to be with you and sees no future for the two of you.

She says no more kissing.  No more sex.  She doesn’t even want to be friends.  In fact, in the moment of being informed of your new status, it may appear that she is not even sure what she wants.  She might even waffle around and say stuff that is confusing.

But at the end of the day, when you add it all up.

This thing you and your ex gf had is over. Finished.  Put a pin in it because she says she is not coming back to you and you should find someone else.

Or maybe NOT.

You see, just because your ex gf brings a close to this chapter of the relationship doesn’t mean the next chapter doesn’t hold promise for the two of you to patch things back together.

10 Ways Your Ex Girlfriend Broke Your Heart

Things can be a lot worse.

I mean really bad stuff can go down between you and your ex

Now I happen to be a breakup expert so I have seen and heard some of the worst breakup stories.

But guess what?

Even when things seem completely hopeless, slap yourself across the face and be reminded that it ain’t over until its over and you have completely give up.  And even then, it may not be over.

So do you know what the 10 worst things an ex can say to you?

Now if any of these things are ever said to you, don’t panic.  Remember that when someone shows a whole lot of passion to say something horrible to you, then they must have really cared about you once before.  So you have that going for you.

Once you have a foothold on someone’s heart, there can be ways to find your way back in.

OK, so let’s get to these so called shocking things no guy ever wants to hear from their ex gf.

Get ready, because it’s not pretty.  And don’t forget, if your ex tells you any of the things found on this list then don’t be too quick to count yourself out.

Indeed, I have tons of tactics on this website that can help you with getting back on the good side of your ex gf.

So don’t get lost in all the ugly words that might come pouring out.  In most cases, that is just the passions speaking.

Ok, so as I close out this article, I will leave you with….

10 Shocking and Heartbreaking Things Your Ex Girlfriend Told You

Drum roll please….

  1. I hate you and we will never see each other again because I have a restraining order out on you.
  2. You were a terrible lover and I was faking most of the time and that is why I want out.
  3. I was dating and having sex with Tommy the entire time we were together.
  4. I will be telling all my friends how awful you are and we are going to ruin any chances of you ever dating again.
  5. You are a terrible human being and no decent woman will ever want anything to do with you
  6. I only went out with you because your parents pleaded with me to give you a chance.  You failed miserably.
  7. You are incapable of pleasing a woman because you are so poorly equipped down there.
  8.  I need a real man who can take care of me and I don’t think you will ever be that.
  9. I am breaking up with you because I am just not into guys anymore.
  10. I am having a baby by another guy and he is marrying me.
		

Written by EGR team mate

Chris Seiter

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