Understanding An Ex Girlfriend Who Hates You

Have you ever looked up the official definition for hate before?

(For those of you who just opened another browser window up or pulled out your phone don’t bother because I have the definition below.)

Hate- A feeling of intense or passionate dislike for someone or something.

When an ex girlfriend tells a man,

“I hate you”

That man probably freaks out and thinks it’s the end of the world. The truth is that it’s not. In fact, it may be the opposite but more on that later. Right now what I would like to do is give you a quick little education of hate and your ex girlfriend.

Oh, how rude of me…

I haven’t even introduced myself yet have I?

(Those of you who know me you can skip ahead to the first “hate” section.)

Before We Begin I Need To Tell You Something Important

Many men come to this website wanting to get their ex girlfriends back.

But there’s a problem with this line of thinking….

Getting an ex girlfriend back generally isn’t a simple process. It requires a lot of thought, strategy and even a little bit of luck.

The truth is that I can’t tell you everything that you absolutely need to know about getting your ex girlfriend back in this article.

For me to say that I can would be a lie.

Luckily, I have created something that can tell you just about everything you absolutely need to know to get your ex girlfriend back.

You can learn more about it by clicking the button below,

Get Relief Faster With Tactics I Can't Put on the Blog...

 

Who I Am And Why You Absolutely Need To Listen To What I Say

My name is Chris Seiter and I am unlike anyone you have ever met.

Women want me…

Jennifer Chris W-138 copy

Men want to be me…

batman

Ok, all kidding aside I am a relationship consultant with a horrible sense of humor (I apologize.)

For those of you wondering about the woman in the “women want me” picture that is actually my wife so let’s keep that I said that on the down low because I am pretty sure she could beat me up like batman if she ever read that.

Anyways, the thing you have to understand about me is that I take what I do very seriously and my number one priority is to help you get your ex girlfriend back.

With me you aren’t going to get some unintelligible 1,000 word article that gives you generic dating advice like be confident, win back her trust or improve yourself. Instead, you are going to get very long in depth explanations for everything I talk about here. Oh, and when I do give you generic dative advice (like the examples I gave above) will give you a very long explanation for how to do those things.

I guess the point that I am trying to make here is that you won’t find anyone who is going to go as far as I will for you.

Not to toot my own horn here (though that’s what I am about to do) but you probably won’t be able to find another website as helpful as this one and if you do I will probably own it :p .

Of course, you don’t care about any of that do you?

What you probably want to know is how I can help you.

Well, believe it or not but I am one of the most successful relationship repair consultants on the web today.

I have a proven track record of success (just take a look at a few of the comments throughout this site for my references.)

Oh, and lets not forget that I have created a best selling, get your ex girlfriend back book called,

What Would You Do With...
A Proven System That Allowed You to Attract Any Woman You Wanted (Including Your Ex).
Learn More

As a result of all of my efforts I have worked with over 300 clients (men trying to get their ex girlfriends back.)

Not too shabby huh?

Pshh… that’s not even the best part.

On my other website, the sister site to this one, Ex Boyfriend Recovery in which I help women get back with their ex boyfriends I have worked with over 3,000 clients.

Screen Shot 2015-04-20 at 10.09.34 AM

I guess the point I am trying to make here is that I know what I am talking about.

Of course, I don’t want you to listen to me. Let me prove myself to you.

We can start by talking a little about hate.

Hate And Your Ex Girlfriend

haters

You are here because something happened between your ex girlfriend and you.

Oh, and it’s not that she hates you (even though she may.)

No, the two of you went through a breakup.

When a breakup occurs it is one of the most emotional things a human being can go through. In fact, some have even gone as far as comparing it to death. I guess the point I am trying to make here is that going through a breakup brings out some very intense feelings.

Hmm… intense feelings.

I swear I have heard that before.

But where?

Oh, I know!

Look at the definition of hate.

Hate- A feeling of intense or passionate dislike for someone or something.

Breakups tend to bring out the worst in people and your ex girlfriend is probably no different.

It is entirely plausible that the breakup that the two of you went through in and of itself is enough to make her hate you. Of course, that’s where we get into the fun stuff like what caused the breakup.

ROLE PLAY TIME!

Ok, lets pretend that you lied, cheated on and stole from your ex girlfriend.

Well, these three actions,

  1. Lying
  2. Cheating
  3. Stealing

Are enough to make anyone hate you (not just your ex.)

However, just because your ex girlfriend hates you now doesn’t mean she is going to hate you forever.

Look at the definition for hate.

Nowhere in that definition does it say that hate lasts forever.

In fact, I can honestly say that anyone I have personally said, “I hate you” to in the past I don’t hate anymore.

Think of it like paying taxes.

Paying taxes definitely constitutes as an intense and passionate dislike for something.

When you pay taxes you definitely think to yourself,

“I hate this…”

However, six months down the road you really don’t think much about it anymore. You don’t hate it anymore. It’s not on your mind so much.

The same principle applies here.

Just because your ex girlfriend may hate you now that hate isn’t going to last forever (depending on what you did.)

She Said She Hates Me – Do I Even Have a Chance?

getting past her freak out period

I know the feeling you get when your ex girlfriend whats to chew you up and spit you out.

It is like a stampede of bulls are coming at you and they want to trample you down not just once or twice, but over and over again.  That is the strength of those hateful feelings that are emerging from your ex girlfriend.

Now think about this, she is your ex girlfriend for some reason, right?  Is it possible you so angered her, causing all these ugly passionate feelings to rise up in her.

Yeah,  I bet you did something.  Us guys, we can screw it up sometimes with the women.  What is really frustrating though is when you royally piss of your ex and you are not even sure what the hell you did.  Yep, that happens too.

But once she is cocked and loaded with anger and hate, look out.

It is like you are a leper and she wants nothing to do with you, despite what you say or try.

Such is the unbridled fury and hate fest that can rise up when your girlfriend is out for your scalp.

Now if you are lucky and are hooked up with one of the passive aggressive type, you may not be getting lambasted.  But the subtle hatred can come through in other more devious ways.

So you could lie around all day saying to yourself, she hates, she hates me not, feeling bad and sorry for yourself or you can learn what is really going down and how to deal with it.  Yep, I vote for the latter.

There is reason for why she is behaving this way and putting out all of these unmistakable signs of hateful disdain for you.  You can try to charm your ex if you wish, but it won’t get you anywhere when she is in this state.  It is best to let it run its course, doing as little as possible to add fuel to the fire.  Of course, that can be a little tricky when your ex girlfriend is openly challenging you and saying stuff about you.

I know it sucks to be on the receiving end.  But hey, you don’t want to start trying to dish it out back at her.  That never works and is stupid and cruel.

Just accept sometimes things got to pot.

It’s like you went from being a Prince in her mind, a guy she could barely resist and could not stand to be separated from.  Now you are the lowest of the low.  In your ex girlfriend’s mind, you are now the devil and there is practically nothing you can say or do this minute to change her feelings and attitude about you.

But bear in mind I said “this minute”.

You see, your ex girlfriend’s preoccupation for wishing you would just disappear totally and completely from her life is likely going to be short lived.   These awful things she is thinking and saying usually does not have a long fuse. Such is the fickle nature of love and hate.

So what is really going on with this hate fest.  I mean, really, how can this beautiful sweet creature that you love so much suddenly be transformed into a woman who seems disgusted with you in every way.

No doubt your are plagued with all kinds of questions and worries, not the mention all of the crazy, desperate thoughts that rifle through your mind.

You are probably thinking that if your ex girlfriend truly hates you after the horrible breakup, which you may or may not have precipitated, it must mean she has always been a hateful person, right?

Nope, not really.

All of us, including your girlfriend can simply lose it for a while and burn with so much anger that we are completely taken aback.

You may also be wondering about if there are these signs of your ex girlfriend hating you, could things get any worse.

Well, I kinda got good news.

The fact your ex girlfriend is so pissed at you and is shooting daggers at every opportunity (if you are still lucky enough to be in her company) means she has a lot feelings for you.  It is only when you love and care for someone very much, that you have the capacity to be super angry and act in a hateful way toward them.

That is why they call it crazy in love.  You got to be crazy to be in love because it takes all over the emotional map.

So things are looking better already, right!

Oh, but what if you are like this guy…

Hey Chris, my ex girlfriend hates me and has a new boyfriend and told me to never come around because she is sickened by my presence.  Do I even have a chance.  I still love her?”

Chances are you are probably not in this category. Let’s hope not. This dude is in real trouble, but guess what?  It turned out the old boyfriend story was just that….a made up story she used to get back at him.

Then we have this guy…

Hey, my ex hates me for no reason.  I didn’t do her wrong.  She does this every couple of months.  She starts having all these doubts and talking about stuff that I can’t even follow.  So I blow it all off and she gets pissed because I am not taking her seriously, she says.  What do you do when your girl is an emotional wreck?”

This situation turned out to be a lot easier to manage.

He needed to listen to her.

So listen to her he did, in big way.  I taught him how to listen with empathy and ask questions and then parrot back what she had said.  It made her feel better and things got a whole lot better with them quickly.  They ended having some great sex and guess what this dude ended up doing afterwords.  He took it up a notch after the sex and encouraged her to talk and did a lot of listening and….well, I don’t want to get much more into their sex life, but his girlfriend really appreciates his new found patience.

Now that situation turned out a lot better than what happened to a guy name Ted.  He said, “my ex girlfriend hates me, but I want to be friends and she says no, that she doesn’t see us together again, ever”.

I told him that he really messed up by interjecting the “friend” element into the relationship conversation.

The reason his ex was so upset with him in the first place is because of a really stupid fight.  He wouldn’t say he loved her, but he does really.  It’s just not his way to put his feelings out there in into words.  I am working with him on that.

She broke it off to teach him a lesson.  It hurt him, but now he wants her back and figured if he said “let’s start over and be friends”, she would warm up to him again.  Well, that is not what happened.  She was insulted and hurt that he just wanted to be “friends” and so they are back to quarreling and teetering on the edge.

So as you can see, this whole business with hate and breakups and upset feelings and passionate declarations by an ex girlfriend can get really complicated, fast.

But that is why you have me around!

Now, there are a few more things about ex girlfriends and their capacity to be super upset with you that you need to wrap around your brain.

I want you to think of your efforts of trying to get your angry ex back as coming through the grinder machine.

There is one little wrench I would like to throw into the machine though.

It’s something I like to call the hate scale.  Are you ready for this.  Well, climb on aboard as I am going to take you for a ride!

What Is The Hate Scale?

hate

Ah the hate scale…

Let the hate flow through you.

Am I the only one that finds that meme hilarious?

Anyways, I digress.

The hate scale is a creation I came up just for this article. It is true that you can do certain things to your ex girlfriend during the relationship to make her hate you more than normal.

For example, if you lie to your girlfriend about your whereabouts one night she isn’t going to dislike you as much as if she walked in on you sleeping with her best friend.

I guess the point I am trying to get at here is that not all hate is going to be equal.

So, I would now like to introduce you to the handy dandy HATE SCALLLLEEEEE!!!!!

(Don’t laugh)

hate scale

It’s pretty pathetic I know…

But I think it gets the point across.

Look how mad number 5 looks.

Alright, so the way this scale works is pretty simple. There are five letters with five faces under them. How angry the faces look represent how much hate your ex girlfriend has for you.

Or more specifically, how long it will take your ex girlfriend to get over her hate.

What I am going to do for you now is go down the scale number by number and face by face and explain the outlook for each.

Lets start with one.

A One On The Hate Scale

hate scale

As you can see from the face things aren’t too bad.

In fact, if your ex girlfriend is a one on the hate scale it doesn’t really mean anything. All it really means is that things are good between the two of you.

Heck, a woman who hates you isn’t going to be smiling at you but that face clearly has a smile.

So, you are probably wondering why I even included it on the scale?

It’s very simple. Getting your ex girlfriend to a one on the hate scale is the holy grail of what we are trying to achieve here. After all, you aren’t going to win her back if she is something crazy like a five on the hate scale. However, if she is a one then your job just got a whole lot easier.

Let’s move on.

A Two On The Hate Scale

hate scale copy

Ah, this is where some anger starts to set in.

Look at that face.

It’s not in a rage yet but it is certainly in the beginning stages. If your ex girlfriend is a two on the hate scale it’s pretty much the equivalent of disappointment. For example, if the two of you are talking and she catches you in a lie about something then she is going to be shot up to a two on the hate scale.

Now, I am a glass half full kind of guy so the good news with a two is that it’s very easy to recover from.

Usually a simple apology on your part can do the trick to subside things and bring her back down to a one.

A three on the other hand…

A Three On The Hate Scale

hate scale copy 2

This face clearly looks hurt.

Imagine that you and your ex girlfriend get into a fight.

She says some things…

You say some things…

Neither of you really means them but in the moment you are both looking for something to say to hurt the other person.

You deliver the first punch,

“I never liked your parents. They were crazy.”

She is clearly hurt by this statement since her parents were overly nice to you. So, she gets back at you by promptly telling you,

“You were never good in bed. You didn’t even please me.”

Ding.. Ding.. Ding..

We have a winner.

What she just said to you hurt you on a really deep level.

(Most men are very sensitive about their abilities in the bedroom.)

Well, while you digest her insult you would be a three on the hate scale. You would be angry that she said that to you but hurt at the same time.

Welcome to a three!

Now, this begs the question.

How long will it take a woman to get over a three if she reaches this level?

Well, it could be a few weeks depending on what was said to her and how hurt she is. That’s been my experience.

Let’s move on to a four since that’s when things start to really heat up.

(Pun intended.)

A Four On The Hate Scale

hate scale copy 3

I have been a four on the hate scale with my ex girlfriend before.

I like to call this the yelling face.

You are clearly so angry that you throw logic out the window and start yelling.

I suppose I will let you in on my own personal experience with my ex and being a four on this scale.

I was out at a movie with my family (I am very family oriented so you best not make fun.) Now, when I watch a movie I like to turn my phone off because I have a pet peeve of people answering their phones while I am trying to watch a movie so the last thing that I want to do is annoy the other people in the theater.

That may have been my biggest mistake.

When I got out of the movie I turned my phone on and immediately I was notified that I had gotten a few text messages.

The messages were from my then girlfriend who wanted to tell me that she was out with her friends.

“Ok, cool” I thought to myself.

Then something strange began to happen.

I read a very long message which explained that they as a group would be spending the night at a mutual friends house.

No big deal, right?

WRONG!

Turns out that this mutual friend was a guy who was also having his guy friends sleep over…

What..

The…

F***…

I called her up immediately and…

Well, I won’t bore you with any more details. Let’s just say that the two of us got into a heated argument on the phone and yelling was involved.

So, how long will it take for someone to get over the anger they experience with a four on the hate scale?

Well, drawing on my own experience it can sometimes take months…

In the back of my mind I was always worried to death about her running around with some guy.

It took months before I was able to just move on from it.

A Five On The Hate Scale

hate scale copy 4

Ah a five…

How can I put this so you understand how bad a five is?

Imagine that you are out with your friends one day having drinks with them and catching up on sports.

Heck, let’s just say that you are out with them at a sports bar watching the latest sporting event on TV. You are having an amazing time with them but it’s starting to get late.

You tell your boys that you are going to head on home because you have an amazing girlfriend to get home to.

They don’t want to see you go but realize that it is late and that you do have to get home.

So, you get into your car and make your way home.

On the car ride home you think to yourself,

“I can’t wait to see (insert ex girlfriends name).”

Then you have the thought that every man seems to have when he hasn’t had sex in a while.

“Maybe I will get lucky tonight… Hmm… maybe if I come home, light some candles and give her some of my patented dirty talk I will get laid.”

The thought of having an intimate night with your beautiful girlfriend excites you so you try to get home a little sooner. Then an idea pops into your head.

“Yes, I am totally going to do everything in my power to make love to her tonight. I should probably stop for some wine to create the romantic atmosphere that she wants.”

So, you make a quick detour to a wine story to pick up some wine.

“Ok, Done! Now, I can get home.”

You pull into your driveway with wine in hand and you are super pumped to seduce your girlfriend.

You start to pull out your keys to get into your place and you drop them on the ground. All of a sudden you start to hear something…

Is that music?” you think to yourself.

“Awesome, great minds think alike. She is probably behind that door with lit candles, music and lingerie ready for a night of passion.”

The prospect of your girlfriend in lingerie excites you and you quickly open the door.

What you see next will forever scar you for the rest of your life.

Your girlfriend IS in lingerie…

Your girlfriend HAS lit candles…

Your girlfriend HAS put on music…

There’s just one problem.

They are for someone else.

You literally catch her in the act in bed with some other guy. Basically imagine walking in on this,

cheating signs

Pretty horrifying, huh?

That’s a five on the hate scale.

The emotions, anger and hate felt in this moment are a five.

Basically, this involves any type of situations where someone has been caught cheating or physical abuse is involved.

It can sometimes take years to get over a 5 on the hate scale. Oh, and sometimes if the hate action is bad enough people will hold onto a grudge forever.

You want an example of a bad action where everlasting hate ensues?

Ok, imagine that you are married to a woman who is pregnant and you catch her sleeping with someone else WHILE SHE IS PREGNANT…

You are filled with all sorts of doubt about whose kid this is so you are forced to take a paternity test.

If that happened to you, you would probably experience a hate so deep that it would never end.

Luckily for you, these types of situations are extremely rare and almost every other situation you can recover from. In fact, what I would like to do now is talk a little about the most common reasons an ex girlfriend can potentially hate you after a breakup.

The Two Most Common Reasons For Why An Ex Girlfriend Can Hate You After A Breakup

common sense

In this section I am going to briefly discuss the most common reasons for why an ex girlfriend can hate you after a breakup. Oh, and since I went through so much trouble explaining the hate scale above we are going to be using it as a benchmark for the level of hate your ex girlfriend is probably experiencing if this wrong was done to her. However, most importantly it will allow you to pinpoint exactly how long it will take for your ex girlfriend to get over the “wrong.”

In addition to explaining the common reasons for hate I am also going to explain how to overcome them. After all, this is a guide teaching you how to get your ex girlfriend back if she hates you.

Let’s get started.

Cheating (A Five On The Hate Scale)

cheating level

This is the most obvious reason in my humble opinion.

I am normally not into things like this but I was surfing around YouTube about a year ago and I stumbled across a video entitled,

“Understanding Infidelity”

Now, seeing as how I am a relationship consultant who is always on the lookout for new knowledge to absorb I figured the video would be educational for me so I ended up watching it.

(I looked all over for the video to post here but it must have been taken down 🙁 .)

Anyways, the video basically had this really old guy (which made me question his credibility) explaining how cheating is the number one epidemic that kills relationships. Now, thinking I was hot sh*t I shrugged my shoulders and thought to myself,

“Heard it before… What else you got?”

Then he brought a woman on stage who told a story about cheating so horrifying that I still think about it today.

You want to hear the story?

Of course you do. I set it up perfectly.

Ok, so this woman comes up on stage and starts telling a story of how much she loved her boyfriend. She talked about how being with him was like being in a world made completely of rainbows, butterflies and lollipops.

It seemed like he loved her too from what she said.

He was always there for her emotionally and met her every need. I guess the point she was trying to make is that she had never been so satisfied in a relationship.

And then it happened…

He left his phone out one day.

So, she did what pretty much every woman does in that situation.

She picked it up and scrolled through the text messages.

She was greeted with something that looked like this,

cheating

The woman was horrified at what she had just stumbled across.

Her man was cheating on her…

It felt worse than a punch in the gut.

She started hyperventilating and pretty much had a full on panic attack on the spot.

Once the panic attack had concluded she was filled with a rage that even scared the devil himself.

What followed was pretty generic.

He came into the room…

She confronted him about the message…

He made up a lie…

She confronted him further…

He admitted to the cheating…

She threw his clothes on the lawn…

All in all, pretty basic stuff.

But that wasn’t the scariest part of the story. The scariest part of the story is what happened to her emotionally after the cheating. You see, this woman was under the impression that she made her boyfriend (now ex boyfriend) happier than anyone in the world.

The fact that he was cheating on her proved that, that wasn’t exactly true.

All of a sudden she was filled with some very scary thoughts.

“Maybe I’m not good enough..”

“Maybe I’m destined to be alone forever…”

“No man can ever stay faithful to me…”

Oh, maybe I should mention that she had a dating history of men cheating on her.

So, somewhere in her mind she had a very disturbing thought.

“Maybe there is a way I can end the pain forever?”

Look, I am not good about beating around the bush so I am just going to come out and be honest about this.

This woman decided that the only way for her to stop feeling bad was to end her life…

So, she tried overdosing on pills.

Luckily, she was unsuccessful and was saved.

The reason that she told the story is to further explain the affect that cheating can have on a human being.

So, when I say that cheating is a five on the hate scale you better believe it.

Of course, understanding why cheating is a five is one thing. Figuring out how to overcome the five is another.

How To Overcome The Hate Of Cheating

I will try to keep this as brief as possible since there is a lot of hate to dish out other than cheating.

I don’t want to mislead you but a five on the hate scale can take years for someone to get over. If you cheated on your ex girlfriend then I assure you that you have a lot of work cut out for you.

Luckily for you I have put together a very in-depth guide on how to overcome cheating (if YOU cheated on your ex girlfriend here.)

Then of course for those of you who want a more comprehensive game plan for overcoming cheating I recommend that you check out my book, Ex Girlfriend Recovery PRO.

A Really Horrible Lie (A Four On The Hate Scale)

lies

I just want to start off by saying that a four on the hate scale can sometimes take months for a woman to get over.

So, you may be a little alarmed that a lie can potentially rate as a four.

Please don’t misunderstand me here.

When I talk about a lie I am not talking about the simple lies we tell every day like,

“Do I look fat in this?”

“Why no honey”

(Even though she does.)

I am talking about the kind of deception that is so horrible that a woman will feel violated after she finds out the truth.

Ok, lets pretend that I was dating your ex girlfriend. Now, before you start charging me with a pitchfork you should give your ex a chance to because I am about to lie to her.

Lets say that during the “get to know you” phase I tell her that I am completely single and have no children.

She hears this and gets very excited because she has strong hopes that she will meet a man, get married and have a family…

HER OWN FAMILY (not someone else’s.)

Here’s the truth though, I am not single. In fact, I am married. I also have two children with this woman.

After dating your ex girlfriend for a year I finally decide to come clean to her and tell her that I told her a massive lie, that I was single without children, when in fact I am married with children.

After hearing this your ex girlfriend becomes filled with an anger so deep that it’s hard to put into words…

This would be a four on the hate scale.

Final Thoughts

Before we say our good byes, let me encourage you to drop us a line below.  Just go on down to the comment section and weigh in.  We might be able to offer you some advice and we like to hear what is going with our visitors.

		

Written by EGR team mate

Chris Seiter

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235 Comments on "Understanding An Ex Girlfriend Who Hates You"

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Brody
Guest
So my ex and I met and took things pretty slow , I’m 23, she was 18. We hung out a few times , then slowed down for a month , went on a trip together and finally eventually started staying the night with each other about 3 months into it , we started dating about 4 months into it , we stayed together everyday for 3 months, I had friends , she had friends we took time apart. Anyways she ended up at college an 1.5 hours away , things we’re great for her first two months of college… Read more »
Jason
Guest
Hi, me and my girlfriend of 1 year and 8 months broke up at the end of October (so coming up to 3months now). We had loads of arguments during the relationship but we always made up and moved on for the sake of our love, but there was one incident I raged at her about a year ago and in October she accused me of doing the same thing she did that caused me to rage.. admittedly there was some truth to it. It wasn’t cheating or anything but I can see from her side that it was a… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Jason,

If you dont work it out after that meet up, restart nc and stick to atleast 30 days

Brady
Guest
Hi. So I was dating this girl for about two years. Around the two year mark, things started to fall apart because I lied about talking to other girls for a lot of the second year of our relationship. By a lot, I mean probably about four times with four different girls, and by talking to, I meant solely flirting with them for a singular night. So for four nights throughout the second year, I lied. We took a semester apart so we could grow as people and then we tried things out again. She saw I was talking to… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Brady,
Give her a week, if she still doesn’t want to work it out, start the nc period..

Brody
Guest

I did give her a week, she ignored all my attempts and wouldn’t respond. Last I contacted her was on the 14th of February, I’ve heard nothing from her. But her social media likes have made suggestions towards me as “ never chase a men let them chase you “

Nikola
Guest
Me and my ex girlfriend were together for 5 months. Look what happened, i met her the summer 2016, we was talking, one boy who liked her then made her to talk to me. He is one lie, however she Is from England and i am from Bulgaria but every summer she is coming to Bulgaria to her grandparents. we was texting since he gone to England, after this she started to have feelings to me, i was highly in love with her from the start. She said yes on 26 of july 2017 i will never forgot that date!… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Nikola,

When was the last you broke up and the last time you talked? Are you going to do the nc rule?

Shay
Guest

Hello Amor i have post my story about 3 4 days havent got any feedback and havent appear in the comment section

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Shay,
Give her space for now
Apologize when you can contact her

Raul
Guest
Hi, Me and my ex dated for a year and half. We got through some problems, but we managed to get back together. She broke up with me 5 times. 6 months ago (end of May) she just decided to breakup with me for I don’t know what reason and eventually after few weeks she blocked me from everywhere. I still kept in touch with her through emails to make sure she is doing well. In August she unblocked me and we spoke from time to time. During this time she told me that she loves me and she misses… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Raul,

Do you want to try the no contact rule?

Douglass
Guest
I am… But I still think about it on a daily basis and I see we both sort of look at each other still, but I feel like her stares are out of hate maybe… I’m in a relationship right now, but I can be anywhere or doing anything without thinking about her, or remembering something from the relationship. Nobody I’ve been with has ever compared to her in any aspect, perhaps she was just out of my league… She’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me, and I have honestly been severely depressed ever since, having breakdowns, crying,… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

You’re in a relationship? as in gf-bf? If you wanted to get her back, you shouldn’t be in a relationship right now..

Douglass
Guest
I’m only in a relationship because one of my closest friends needed support, and I wanted to be there for her. Yes, she has feelings for me, but she’s literally trying to be with this one girl (which I’m completely supportive of) as I just wanted to be a shoulder to lean on. And I don’t even think getting her back is even an option, after how much she hates me. Plus the no contact between us. I feel like I’ve ruined my entire life with this. I cut myself just to relieve the emotional pain I’ve been feeling. I… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Stop cutting yourself. You have to get counseling. It will help you a lot on how to start over.. Do new activities that help you grow like going to a short course or volunteering

John
Guest
Hello Amor!I’m pretty embarrassed about writing to this website,but i feel like i have to change what happened with my ex,one way or another,and this is my last hope. I will tell you a bit about our relationship and what happened and how we broke up (it’s gonna be a long message so please don’t kill me >_<) My ex and me were together for nearly 2 years.We had a really good relationship.We were happy with each other,went out a lot,had a lot in common,and loved each other.Yes we had our problems (sometimes i would act a bit like an… Read more »
John
Guest
Hello Amor!You see,I need help.I am pretty embarrassed for writing this,but i still,you are my final hope for helping me fix what broke my relationship with my ex. You see,we had a relationship for nearly 2 years.She was 19,I was 21.We loved each other so much.We had our problems yes,sometimes i was acting silly,or sometimes my ex would be a bit mean to me,but regardless,we were deeply in love,especially her. After she went to university though,something changed about her,she became more mean to me,she was getting more aggresive,and a lot of things happened to her family too,but i still loved… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

HI john,
Do you want to try the no contact rule?

Pablo
Guest
I’ve been with my girlfriend for 8 years now, she leaves 3 houses away from mine we started dating on my 10th grade and she was in first year varsity, she is older than me, my family hates her but her family likes me I think but they hated her because they always said when she settles she will find someone better and she will leave me. but I loved her so much and she showed love too, and when she got settled sadly she did leave me. I hated her soo much soo badly because I found out on… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Pablo,

Are you in nc now?

Primo
Guest
Hi my GF of 9 months broke up with me because i was not doing my chores properly and bad at listening. By the time i realized my mistake it was too late and she said her heart is set on the breakup. we still live together and i will be moving out in December. even after we broke up she was extremely caring, but after a week later we both saw each other at the club and when i asked her to dance with me she said she doesn’t want to, so i gave her space and left without… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

HI Primo,

this is from the other site but you can still use it’s advice:
EBR 027: What To Do If You Live With Your Ex Boyfriend

Douglass
Guest

Hey, I’m looking for some help with my ex, but my entire comment was deleted… It was at least a thousand words.

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Douglas,

It wasn’t deleted. Sorry, I just haven’t reached it yet. Is she always that disrespectful to you? Because if she is, you should move on. Don’t let other people treat you that way.

Douglass
Guest
Hi, so I’ve been dealing with issues with my ex for the past 5 months or so. She was, and still is my everything. I’ve been with other people, but I’ll never feel the same way as I did for her. We were moving along well enough, and then it suddenly came to a stop. But it was still okay, being that she claimed to still love me, just that we should “wait a while”. Completely gave me hope, an we continued on being really close friends until the summer. …Then things became heated. She wouldn’t text me on her… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Douglas,

It wasn’t deleted. Sorry, I just haven’t reached it yet. Is she always that disrespectful to you? Because if she is, you should move on. Don’t let other people treat you that way.

Douglass
Guest
Yes, she does… But she’s known around the school as like one of the nicest girls. I agree, and I believe I had to be horrible to make her *hate* me (yes, I read the entire article). She was the sweetest thing, and I love her with all my heart. She still stares, and I have anxiety because of it. She means the world to me, and I’ve been nothing but kind to her. I simply plan to wish her a happy birthday when it comes around, and then continue on with the silence. I do not wish to be… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Actually, you shouldn’t greet her during nc too.. You should be active in improving yourself and being with your friends

Karan
Guest

Actually I broke with my gf thrice a time before she was not talking but in between she came to me to have a converse,1 month we have a good converse, now suddenly she is not talking to Me and I don’t know the reason behind it!please guide me what I”ve to do

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Karan,

Do you want to try the no contact rule?

Luca
Guest
Hi! My gf just broke up with me less than a month ago, (will make a month in about 10 to 15 days) because I had a bad behavior (jealously, tried to control like by wanting to know where she was and stuff like that, and the worst of all, acted impulsively when a guy tried to kiss her at a club we were, and I ended up grabbing her by her nape and pulling her towards me, she was very hurt) I was also needy, put her on a pedestal, and I did not gave her space when she… Read more »
Luca
Guest

Also, forgot to say: I already know what I did wrong and am working on it, this friend of hers is gay, and we were together for 2 months only (but she’s my first gf and my first love, btw I’m 22 and she’s 19, we’ll both have our birthdays in august this year.)

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

if want to to try, do it.. but you need to restart nc. Start the count from the first day you stopped talking to her friend

Devin
Guest
My ex girlfriend broke up with me because we went through a thing of people spreading rumors about her and i confronted her and she told me that non of it was true but because she quit talking to me and hanging out with her friends(girls only). I kept crying and begging her to talk to me and tel me what was wrong. She wouldnt tell me and then said we needed a break lets just say i had to go to the hospital because of my actions of suicide. But she left and took our 2 kids. I wanted… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Your chances depend and will raise, of you genuinely change and improve

Gord
Guest
Hi Devin, its likely you did one of a few things. The begging and pleading pre and post break really really really doesnt help man!.. Your wheels are stuck in the mud.. You’re hitting the gas but you’re digging a bigger hole! Its highly unlikely your relationship was sound and this one thing came out of nowhere and dismantled it… Highly unlikely! Its sucks, but its how life is. Dont do or say anything that will make her lose respect for you!… Also Women have more needs… More emotional needs than men. Maybe you werent dating and giving her enough… Read more »
John
Guest
Hi, 2 years ago I use to like a girl. When I befriended her she was in a relationship with an other guy. I expressed her my feelings. She took it casually. But later on when she broke up with that guy. She started giving me her time. I got her into relationship with her which lasted 3 months. May be it was rebound but I loved her like hell. I was Savage and needy. She broke up with me. I feel that she took me as a creepy needy guy. Cause I even begged for her. Now she’s reluctant… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

why do you think it doesn’t work?

Patrick
Guest
Hi so I was wondering if I still have a shot with my ex. We recently broke up and she said it is because I didn’t respect her one wish which was not to show any affection when her young son from a previous relationship was around. We had dated on and off for about 4 years and she and I have broken up numerous times but always got back together. She always said each time we got back together that I was the one and no matter what she said or did she would always come back to me.… Read more »
Patrick
Guest

I should also mention we have been broken up about a month and while have tried to start the no contact rule I failed because her birthday passed, so after 12 days I caved and texted and then over the course of the next few days we had a few text fights and she asked me to leave her alone. I’m going to try no contact for the full duration now but is there no chance?

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

don’t lose hope too early, finish the no contact rule first. Make the most of it by improving yourself and being active in posting.. and then slowly build rapport.

Jacob
Guest
My girlfriend and I broke up a few weeks ago because I lied about hooking up with a girl when we were on a break. We’ve been together for about a year and 4 months and we’ve had so many great memories together. We went on a break for a month about 3 months ago. I felt really guilty about it and thought she needed to know but I lied twice about it then finally told her the truth, I love her unconditionally and really see a future with her (we’ve spoken about marriage and kids) but she now hates… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Give her space for now..do at least 2 weeks nc

Joseph
Guest
Hello, so me and my ex girlfriend broke up about 2 1/2 months ago. We had dated for about 6 months. Her reasons for breaking it off were that she didn’t want to date anyone and that she didn’t like me anymore. For the first month we stayed in contact and i pleaded many times (about 5 times) to be friends or give the relationship another shot. After a month when she got really annoyed at a basic conversation i gave her some space and didn’t talk to her for the second month. Well two weeks ago i reached out… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

do at least 30 days nc.. focus in improving yourself.. don’t initiate talking to her.. if she approaches you, be politely short and direct and don’t beg again.

Joseph
Guest

okay i also said some pretty mean stuff after the breakup (we both did) so do you think after the nc i should first apologize? how should i go about contacting her after the 30 days nc.

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

you can, but don’t make it too serious.. Check this one:
How To Use Text Messages To Get Your Ex Girlfriend Back

Shameel
Guest
Hey, So basically me and my girlfriend (her name was riley), dated for a year and a half and we broke up about 8 months in because we got in a fight and she broke up with me (the fight was something stupid). We got back together the next day but her parents never knew we did because i was foreign and i was going off to college, so they didnt want us getting back together. But we did. We dated for another 6 months and broke up again bc of another fight (it was something kinda stupid and i… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

let her be for now.. do you want to try the no contact rule?

Jamie
Guest

Hey , I was with a girl and she honestly was the love of my life it’s been 2 years since we broke up and I’ve tried to get back with her and she just hates me so I’ve waited for a year almost messaged her apologising and managed to get a call with her and she just hates me again and I don’t like anyone else then her

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Jamie,

You started on the wrong foot.. Instead of apologizing, you should have started on just being friendly… But the more important thing is if you improved yourself. In order for someone to be attracted to you, you have to have confidence first, and you don’t beg for them like you..

Joachim
Guest
Hey, My ex broke up with me about 2 months ago. We loved each other a lot but i had trust issues with her because we were in a long distance relationship. Before our break up, we fought quite often mostly because she wanted a break and she would get angry at me for no reason. I really love my ex and want her back. We had some really kind and loving moments. When we broke up, I threatened her to commit suicide and pulled off a lie with the help of my friends. She believed it but decided to… Read more »
Joachim
Guest

Also we were in a relationship for 1 year and 9 months.

Joachim
Guest

She is swedish and I also applied for a visa to move to her with our mutual consent. I cant anymore because she dumped me. We were planning to marry someday at one point in our relationship.

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Joachim,

do you want to try the no contact rule?

Joachim
Guest
I have tried the NC but she seems to be still unforgiving. I asked her if it was over between us and she said yes. I work, go to the gym and am doing things right in my life but I want her back because I know that this is the girl I want to marry some day. She is far from me in the arms of a new guy. I feel bad for him if he is a rebound but I am also worried that he could not be. They basically had a honeymoon together in India while I… Read more »
Joachim
Guest

Also do you this is a rebound relationship she is having?

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

how long did you do the nc period? How much did you improve during and after it? after the letters, she would view you more as the chaser, which is not attractive especially that she has a new bf now.. I dont think it’s a rebound too..You need to appear as the Alpha male in her eyes for her attracted again.. check this one:
How To Make Your Ex Girlfriend Attracted To You Again

Joachim
Guest

I improved a lot. I sent her one letter for closure of how I am doing. I did not beg her or anything. And how do I appear as an alpha male if I am blocked.

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

ok that’s good.. you have to make your posts public because there’s still a chance that she will be curious on you, if you have mutual friends that helps too

Nick
Guest

My girlfriend of three years broke up with me a few weeks ago, and her new boyfriend made her stop talking to me. I messaged her to talk about at least staying friends with her, but got into an argument with her new boyfriend, made him reconsider dating her, and now she said she hates me and has blocked me on everything. I really love her, and even if we can’t date, I just want to be a part of her life.

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Nick,

do you want to try the no contact rule/

Jaje
Guest
Mate I am finding it hard to listen love your self before anybody else she didn’t love u for her to go with a new man it ended ages ago u just never sore it like us men don’t u will miss her u probley get upset and cry but for god sake mate do not beg like a dog your better than that we don’t need girls to be happy and if u fill like u do it because your needy and looks silly u will get threw this trust me so sack her off she won’t even be… Read more »
Mike
Guest

why does she hate me ?
long list where do i start.
message too often , talk to other girls while she is around, in her i am cheating with other girls, confront on topics , she is a A aka alpha female.
there is more that is good for a start.
how to i get my ex back?

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Mike,

do you want to start the no contact rule and improve yourself?

Tomy
Guest
Hi Amor, I had a three month relationship with a girl. Our engagement was fixed by our parents. But during that time I never behave well with her. I even said bad about her parent. I behaved badly with her and then I tried make her happy by telling so many things. In that time he thaought I am a very bad guy and crazy (mad). After two days of our break up I tried to contact her and ask for forgiveness. I trying to talk with her for the last two year but she never received my call. Recently… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Tomy,
are you in the no contact period right now?

Dalton
Guest
I cheated on my ex girlfriend and lied to her because she didn’t want me to hangout with certain people and I want her back and i’ve changed things about my self but she says that we aren’t getting back together but she still got mad at me one day when i was hanging out with someone that she didn’t want me to why would she get mad at me and be rude? And one day she asked me what was wrong i told her i was having a bad day and had a dream about are miscarriage child and… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Dalton,

why doesn’t she want you to hang out with your friends? Have you talked to her? Does she know you cheated? When did you break up? And when was the last time you talked? Do you want to try the no contact rule?

Jovi
Guest

hi. i broke up with my girlfriend about 4 years ago i want to get back in contact with her but i don’t know how i cant just randomly call her i don’t know what to do.
PS. I WANT HER BACK

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Jovi,

aside from initiatng contact, have you improved from the person she used to know? Because if you didn’t, do that first. And then, think of the things she loves, and use that as a first contact text. For example, I love coffee and cats:

I just saw, a cat drinking her owner’s coffee! And I thought of you after a while. How are you?

and then slowly rebuild rapport and attraction

Lee
Guest
Hey I need major help. Me and my Ex girlfriend broke up about a month ago and she gave me another chance. Until yesterday when I messed up again. She was meeting other people and having sex and stuff where I was talking to people whilst we were single. With all this i was talking to a girl and she saw everything i wrote and has now blocked me on everything. What should I do? The main thing I used to do is Lie a lot please help me because she means the world to me and I cannot imagine… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

HI Lee,

I don’t understand. Did she meet other and had sex with other people? And then you were telling people you were single? BUt you’re really single right?

Lee
Guest
Hi Amor Basically we went on a break and the day we decided to have a break and she slept with someone the day after and said she regretted it. Then i went super crazy and called her stuff. So it prolonged us getting back. Now we were at the same stage again with her wanting to take me back but this time I started speaking to someone else in a flirty way and she saw but with all this going on she was still meeting other guys for casual sex and getting drunk and sleeping with someone. Now i… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Take no contact as a restart, and then avoid dating during it for now to avoid conflict

Sea
Guest

Hi guys I’m seeking for some advise, i broke up with my ex nearly year ago, we were together for 4 years. During break up period we met few times and had good talk, now i’m really trying to get her back. I know she is the one and i really want to marry her, but she hates me so badly and blocked me everywhere, can’t send message at all. I have sent 3 letters but there is no response at all. I’m freaking out what should i do next, please needed your advise.

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Sea,

why does she hate you?

Brandon
Guest
So me and my girlfriend broke up, we both said alot of bad things. The reason she said we broke up was because I never treated her right, that I was too possessive of her. So what does she do? Contact her ex. She has known him for 3 years, while I’ve known her for 2. She basically said her ex (who has a gf) has always cared about her when I didnt (which got me mad as hell). She most of the time ignores me, but when she contacts me she just tells me bye and that she dosent… Read more »
Brandon
Guest

Forgot to add, we broke up 6 days ago, and i really want her back. Because I really care about her nevertheless, how do I get her back?? She is mad and litterally hates me, even if she dosent say it directly.

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Brandon,

you’re together for 2 years or you just know her for 2 years now? are you in no contact now?

Christopher
Guest

Hello Amor, she asked for help monetarily. She had said she would handle a bill of ours but can’t manage it currently so she asked for help. But in the course of that she said she was afraid to ask because the break up was her Fault… does that mean anything? Or am I reading too much into things?

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

HI Christopher..

I don’t think it means anything.. it’s just what it is.. she needs money.

Christopher
Guest

Thank you Amor,
We have debt between us and that’s all I respond to. I didn’t respond to that message. I’m working one now 100℅ I still love her though.

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

oh ok.. that’s alright.. you’re welcome!

Christopher
Guest

Thank you Amor, I didn’t respond to that.and since then I’ve only and will only respond to business between us (debt program we were involved with) thank you. I still love her but I need to improve for me as well.

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

oh ok.. that’s alright.. you’re welcome!

Christopher
Guest
After this wonder if there is any hope for us. Chris, I appreciate the fact you have realized your mistakes. It takes courage to admit when you are wrong. I wish you the best in all your endeavors and hope we can both apply the knowledge we gained through this relationship. Like a pencil eraser, it becomes smaller the more it is used until it is gone. Love and patients are the same. I feel no anger or hate towards you but there is no love as well. I was very patient and caring towards all your different paths and… Read more »
Christopher
Guest

We were together almost 8yrs

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Christopher,

i hope you didn’t respond to that… start no contact now.. I think you will have to do a long time because you had a long relationship.. and it looks like she’s really had enough.. maybe 3-6 months and genuinely change yourself and your routine

Barry
Guest
Hey guys I could really use some advice, but it’s a difficult one. My ex AndI are married to other people and have children with them. Neither of us approve of affairs and would never choose to have one, but we found something in each other that we had never felt with anyone before, and it ended up as an affair, against our better judgement. We shared an incredible relationship, truly like the stuff of fairytales, but the pressure of living double lives put incredible stresses on us. I would have gotten a divorce to be with her, but she… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Barry

I’ll be sarcastic…

she chose money and materials over you, why? would she end up as loor as annie after the divorce?

can’t you both help each other to have at least a sustainable life for both of your children together?

Barry
Guest
Hi Amor I don’t know, I don’t know what to think. As of right now I can’t even talk to her and I guess I have to suck it up and give space (which is SO hard). I guess I am not as affluent as her husband, and I can appreciate how “security” is important to a mother, but she knew all this about me when we were seeing each other. I will be working on improving my financial situation, but I hoped there was more to me than just that. I don’t know what to do or what to… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

yeah it can mean she still loves you but she chooses her life right now.. if it’s financial for her children, shouldn’t the dad contnue support for them after separation?
maybe she wants an uncomplicated relationship of her kids with their dad and maintaining the wholeness of the family right now

Barry
Guest

Hi Amor

Thank you once again for your reply. If that’s what it was, I would understand and respect it. If she had made that clear, I wouldn’t have struggled nearly as much as I have been. The vague mixed messages whilst the situation deteriorated utterly messed me up to the point of seeking professional help. All I needed was clarity.

aman
Guest
Hi, My gf broke my heart 4year ago. I still remembers that paining moment,Somehow i moved. As we were in Long distance relationship we were getting very less time to spend with other….she got attached with her best friend…In jan 2016 she contacted me via Facebook (in these last 4yr i never contacted her) . She said sorry for everything..i dont know,why but i was the one who insisted her for again a relationship..but just after 2 months it got over.As we both accused eachother for the last time breakup…we are talking again but she doesn’t takes intrest while talking..i… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

HI AMan,

how are you now? I think you went too fast on getting back with her.

Jordan
Guest
Hi, my name’s Jordan (18) I was left a week ago today by my ex Olivia (16), her reasoning behind leaving me was that I was too heavy and obsessive, this had all come out during an argument that had rose up last week. We were a perfectly fine and healthy couple, both are families welcomed each other. The only flaws of my ex was that she was the nearest thing to bipolar, she could flip and change her mood in an instant, but she’d always apologise and make up to me, she also has a few anxiety problems that… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

HI Jordan,

are you in no contact now?

Jordan
Guest

We stayed in contact for a week, but I’m blocked everywhere now because it’s easier for her to move on if she can’t speak to me, what do I do?

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

you have to ne patient but use this time to improve yourself while you’re still blocked

Kance
Guest
Hey guys last time i was with my ex-girlfriend for about 1 and a half year we recently broke up 4 month ago and i really wan to get her back ._. We been together about 1 and a half year we did not cheat or lie or anything to each other cause both of us are first love I can feel we really love each other last time. We broke up because of some arguement not really big deal actually she once told me after being together with me all her friends stopped find her for chatting anymore she… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor
Hi Kance, did you mean she lost time with her friends when you were together and you were always fighting near the end of your relationship? You should stop chasing her by stopping to text her and start no contact process. Since you go in the same in the same school, it will be a limited contact. Don’t initiate a conversation with her and if she approaches you for a small talk, just reply politely short. If you could excuse yourself, excuse yourself after answering her. Have a make over, join new clubs, make new friends, go to the gym,… Read more »
Kance
Guest

Yup is correct that she lost time with her friends and we’re fighting near of the relationship.
Thanks for u advice, she also told me she dont even want to talk or text with me because I’m like some people cant chase away is disturbing her so I will try my best to avoid as many stuff as I can. I just a bit confused what is the 30-45 days?

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

it means you don’t contact or like her posts for at least 30 days and at most 45 days

Kance
Guest

I see sure because my ex also not that kind of people post stuff she just scroll and look about what her friends’s post

Banfic
Guest
Hey guys, so i was dating this girl just a month, and we had some ups and downs. Problem is my friend who was talking about how he meets with her and stuff even though i found out that was all a big lie. This girl i was meeting saw some messages between me and him and he was saying something like ” i m going to meet her for tonight and she will give me some” and my reaction too it was “go for it and say hello to her cat” reason why i wrote this because he was… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Banfic,

you have to apologize sincerely and explain the situation first and then let her cool off before talking to her again.

Rafael
Guest
So last april my girlfriend(we were together for 4 months) told me she wanted to be friends first so that she could focus on college and also she didn’t want to limit herself to me, sh felt that she wasn’t ready for a relationship yet and that she didn’t want to commit to anyone first. At first of course I didn’t know what to do, I mean she’s my first girlfriend(same applies to her) so I panicked. She told me she was happy I was willing too wait but I guess I didn’t give her the space, and time she… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Rafael,

I think she was embarrassed with what she found out and her “anger” is one reaction to it..are still working together?

Ronnell Jeron Simmons
Guest
Ronnell Jeron Simmons
Hey i am really emtionally, depressed, and feeling lonely. Me and ex broke like almost a month ago and been friends while trying to improve the relationship. We have a 10 month year old daughter and we had a distance relationship that been going for 2 years now. I had just recently seen her 4 days ago and we had alot of fun untill the last day i was there, we got into a big argument and i end putting my hands around her neck and started choking her. I had a couple of beers and was not myself. Her… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Ronnell,
have you talked again? I think it’s better to go to couple’s counseling

Amalia
Guest
Hi, I could really use an advice or two. My ex hates me so much that she didn’t want me anywhere near her. We’ve been together for about half a year, at first, everything was smooth, spend a lot of time with her. But at some point i became cold, and started spending less time with her. And whenever she needed me, i wasnt there to support her emotionally. She would always cry almost about every problem. I told her i got tired of all thr problems but made sure that it didn’t mean i dont want to support her.… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

HI Amalia,

she needs to see professional help first because cutting herself is a sign she may be depresses and her indecisiveness adds to that.

Sam
Guest
I’ll try to keep this short. I had been dating this great girl for a while, and things were fantastic. She made me happy, and I was being a stellar boyfriend. She used the words “swept me off my feet” days before the breakup. We are in college together and she is really busy becoming a doctor and under a lot of pressure. She felt like she couldn’t make me happy and was upset about it. We had a talk about this and she actually told me that she wanted me to date her and date other women so I… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Sam,

try nc for 45 days.. and then when you start to text just come from a friendly perspective.. make.it seem that you’re moving on during nc on your posts

James
Guest
Ok here’s a long one, but I’m desperate for advice. My ex and I were together nearly 4 years. We had a breakup last year in March, after which I found out she was cheating on me. At the time we lived together – which complicated things. I did no contact, and she flipped out after about 5 days. long story short, I confronted her about the cheating and told her to get her things and get out. After pleading with me to take her back, I relented and we worked on our relationship for about a year. We were… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi James,

It’s ok to meet for things like that because it’s needed as long as you don’t talk about feelings and the relationship, but since you did, of course you’re now back in no contact.. let her have her space so she can think.. Just greet her in her birthday.. treat this month as a restart for both of you.. come from that point of view when you’re going to start texting her again. Take it slow and don’t talk about the relationship right at the start.

James
Guest
Thanks so much for the advice. There’s been an update – apparently she didn’t like the pictures I’ve been posting of me being happy and doing fun things, and she unfollowed me on instagram (main social media app for both of us) and blocked me on facebook (although she remained friends). I assume she can still see my facebook posts, but that was an unexpected bad turn. So basically from what I can gather, she doesn’t respond to communication unless it’s about business, she’s not very engaged when we do communicate, she broke it off with me, she’s dating other… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi James,

I hope you didn’t try to get her to unblock you.. Just let her be and continue to post.. in a way, her actions mean she’s still affected by you.. And we don’t know if she’s not checking your account through others.. So just keep following the nc method.

James
Guest
Nope. I haven’t done anything. Just sticking to the game plan. I have stepped it down a bit on Facebook though – I typically post two or three times a day, but I went a couple of days without posting anything. And now I plan to just post a picture or update or two every couple of days. Thanks for your advice. This website is a fantastic resource, and Chris must be a genius to think of doing this website. It would be truly amazing if you added a forum to your site. So, about how long into no contact… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

you don’t have to do it right ahead.. if she doesn’t respond well after nc, like if she’s friendzoning you, then you could do a little jealousy move

James
Guest

Thanks so much for your help. One last quick question. We have already done No Contact for 23 days. Now I did screw up and send her an email and a letter – and we had our business conversation via text message. Apart from that, we have maintained no contact. I restarted no contact after we communicated via text. From your experience, should I be counting the no contact period from the initial startup, or should I have restarted no contact for an additional 30 days?

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

of the talk was purely business that’s ok, you’re not breaking nc..but if it was personal, you have to restart count

James
Guest
Well there’s been an update. She contacted me again for business reasons and told me she doesn’t trust me and she wants me to never contact her again. I am confused because she was the one that was unfaithful and I have remained committed. My assumption is that she needed a reason to justify all this. Regardless of the reasons behind her actions, what does this mean for me? An extended no contact period? I originally planned a 21 day period, but this changes things. And since her birthday will be around the 45 day mark, should I text her… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor
Hi James, if you’re still blocked and she doesn’t want to talk to you do no contact.. be really busy and continue to post because she might be checking with a different account.. you can’t greet her on birthday.. if she gets angry about it, that just indicates she still has some feelings but you greeting her will not help you get her back.. not greeting her can make her wonder and also, you can’t keep tolerating her attitude. If she doesn’t want to talk, that’s good but if she wants you to greet her after that, it’s like she… Read more »
James
Guest

There’s been another update. We have still not contacted each other. I’ve been posting as recommended. Through the week this week, one by one her friends and family began unfriending me on facebook, and today she unfriended me. Now she can’t see any of my posts – and I know her well enough to know that she is not and has not been checking up on me. She’s the type that doesn’t look back when she makes a decision. I’m about two weeks out from the 45 day mark of no contact. Advice please.

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

did you continue on no contact? YOu have to treat it as a restart after it and she has to come to a point like that too because if you message her while she’s still angry, it won’t help.

James
Guest
I have not contacted her, and I found out through a friend that I am indeed blocked on social media. Its been more than 45 days since I last contacted her, and over 65 days since we initially stopped contact. She is posting pictures of her hugging and kissing another guy on her social media, so it’s safe to say she has a rebound. I’m wondering if it is smart to contact her now when she is all enchanted by this new guy, or if it’s best to wait another month or two for them to start having arguments, while… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

it’s better to wait.. first because you’re still blocked. 2ns because, you’re right, they’re still in the honeymoon phase

James
Guest
She contacted me… she sent a few semi-negative texts back-to-back asking me why I hurt her. She hurt me, and I’m doing quite well now. But it would still be great to fix this. I see this as maybe things didn’t work out with her rebound. I didn’t see anything on your site regarding multiple negative messages like that… they weren’t really negative, but they weren’t positive. I understand we should not be talking about the relationship as our first message, but in this situation it seems just plain rude to ignore her and I don’t see it helping me… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

you can say that you apologize for any hurt that you caused but you didn’t mean it.. and then leave it like that.. wait if she sends another text

Darren
Guest
Well were can i starti got to needy clingy done diffrent things and msg her family when she didnot repsond we got over that but after 2 weeks one day in bed she put her pillow over her face so she didnot have to look at me i was upset but since to soft and on tablets i said nothing i went ott with msg again as she knows u prefere face to face or phone but got a facebook msg 3 days later well i went off on one org got freinds she was going to let me come… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Darren,

Correct me if I’m wrong, you texted her a lot and now you’re blocked right and then you decided to do no contact?

Darren
Guest

i made a big mistake huge errors trying to get her back to even been freinds ive been told im creepy i make her sick so ill just leave it at that emotions and feelings i could not help so now def i move on just asked her why she made a facebook page with nothing on it to get my attention and it worked i amdit all my faults and was just wanting forgivness but not to be

Ray hughes
Guest
My girlfriend wants a break. We were 17 when we met and fell madly in love. Had a straight away who is now 5 years old. We were forced to move into a small house in the countryside 40 miles from any family or friends and we didn’t drive. We both smoked weed and stayed up late for the first 4 years of our sons life. She has depression. Big time. She also has ibs syndrome. After for years the social service became involved and I cleaned up my act as a father and partner. She did not. The problem… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Ray,

sorry for the late reply..did you mean you already started nc?

Brennan
Guest
I was dating a girl for 6 months. She made me happier than I have ever been in my entire life but one day about 3 months in she said that someone said that while they were at party that she was making out with one of my friends. She told me so I knew it wasn’t true and I believed her just like I always do. So now to another 3 months she says we need to take a break and that she wouldn’t see any other guys so I shouldn’t see any other girls or she’d be pretty… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

HI Brennan,

For me, you shouldn’t get back with her because you can’t trust her and she’s manipulating your feelings.. Has she even apologized?

Michael
Guest
Hi Chris I was dating a girl for around 6 months, but prior to this we had known and been ‘on/off’ seeing each other for over 2 years. I know that in the initial stages of the courtship/relationship I really hurt her with my actions, as I was seeing other girls and sleeping with them. I knew in my head that she wanted to be exclusive but I thought I couldve have my cake and eat it and she accepted this false pretence that we were merely friends and I continued to sleep with her and other people. I think… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor
Hi Michael, Something certainly happened, or some information got to her after you sent that money.. I don’t know when you’re going to know that but the truth is, you have to wait.. You’ve already asked her what really happened, let’s hope she thinks about telling you the truth after some time.. Give yourself a time limit until when you can wait.. For me, try a month before messaging again, if she doesn’t reply, give yourself time again to on until you can wait for her to answer or move on.. But I believe in time, she’ll tell you.. since… Read more »
martin
Guest

my girlfriend recently broke up with me after a 3 year relationship,…….we have a baby, today was mothers day and we had a row and things got said in the heat of the moment……….now she says she dosent even want us to be friends……….i love her…….what can i do?

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Martin,
Maybe she just said that because she’s angry.. Give her time to cool off first, maybe 3 days or a week and then talk first. Talk calmly and talk about the solutions.. If it doesn’t work, that’s when you do no contact.