By Chris Seiter

Updated on November 17th, 2022

“Should I get back together with her?”

It’s a question that has been swimming around your head so much that you actually went to the internet and somehow found this page. Hey, don’t get me wrong, I’m not judging you. In fact, I am going to do the exact opposite, I’m going to help you.

For those of you who are new to this website then I want you to think of this like the ultimate resource for getting your ex girlfriend back. My goal with this site is to create a resource so powerful that it can literally answer every single question you have about getting your girlfriend back.

As I am sure you have already surmised this page is going to specifically focus on what are the reasons you should get back with your ex girlfriend. Of course, I like going into extreme detail so I am not just going to list out all of the reason in some weak bullet point format.

No, I am going to list the good reasons to reconnect with an ex, the bad reasons to reconnect and go into extreme detail in each one of those reasons.

How This Page Is Going To Be Formatted


Above I said I was going to list the good reasons that you should get back with your ex and in addition to that I would also be listing the bad reasons to get back together with an ex (yes, there are some really bad reasons.) So, I am going to be dividing this page into two main sections.

Care to take a wild guess at what those sections will be?

Section One- Bad Reasons To Get Back Together With Your Ex Girlfriend

Section Two- Good Reasons To Get Back Together With Your Ex Girlfriend

Lets stop wasting time with all this build up and just dive right in.

What Are Your Chances of Getting Your Ex Girlfriend Back?

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The Bad Reasons

(Learn more about how to get your ex girlfriend back with my book.)

so bad

Do you find it a little strange that I started out with the bad reasons as opposed to the good reasons?

I mean, I am sure there is one website browser out there that is just quickly scanning this content and accidentally mistakes the bad reasons for the good reasons and the good reasons for the bad reasons.

(Hopefully this is not you… )

The reason I wanted to start out with the bad reasons was because I feel that men with bad reasons for getting back together with an ex need to be dealt with in a very swift manner. What do I mean by that?

I mean that if you are here and you don’t have a good reason to get your ex girlfriend back then you shouldn’t even try to get her back at all.

I Hate To Do This But… My Mission Statement

I don’t want to help you if you have a bad reason for getting your ex girlfriend back…

You see, if you have a bad reason for getting your ex girlfriend back then that most likely means that you aren’t in it to win it. The kind of men I want to help are the kind that want a long lasting relationship with their ex. I want to help the “good guys” and not the “bad guys” and make no mistake about it, if you want your ex girlfriend back because of any of the reasons I list below in the “bad reasons” section then I DO NOT want to help you. In fact, I don’t even want you on this site.

I am in the business of helping people but I learned a long time ago that there are some people out there with very bad intentions and there have been cases where theses types of people have used my advice and strategies to win their exes back for bad reasons and it always ends bad and I have to live with the guilt that I am in some way responsible.

What Are Your Chances of Getting Your Ex Girlfriend Back?

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So, if you have a bad reason for wanting your ex girlfriend back then I want to make it clear that I do not want to help you. In fact, I would like you to leave my website and never come back.

Now, I bet you are sitting there wondering,

“What are some of these bad reasons?”

I am glad you asked…

Bad Reason #1- For Sex or FWB


I have a confession to make…

The advice on Ex Girlfriend Recovery has been used by an individual to get his ex girlfriend to give him sex which eventually lead to a friends with benefits relationship. The only reason I know this is because the individual who accomplished this ended up emailing me one day and thanking me for making it happen insinuating that getting sex from his ex was all he wanted in the first place.

I felt absolutely horrible upon reading that my strategies were used in helping someone to essentially use this girl and spit her out.

Look, I know it may sound like a pretty good deal to a lot of the men reading this but the truth is that you won’t have a successful relationship with your ex girlfriend if you just want to use her for sex.

Not only is it a despicable thing to do but most women are pretty intuitive and can see right through your intentions.

So, if the only reason you want your ex girlfriend back is so you can use her for sex or start some kind of friends with benefits relationship with her then I would like you to leave this website and never come back. Do the world a favor and go celibate.

Bad Reason #2- No More Routine

the routine

When you date someone you get into a certain routine throughout your day.

For example, you may text each other when you wake up to say,

“Good Morning!!!”

Throughout the day you may call each other to see how the day is going. Heck, you might even see your significant other every night or every other night for a date. The main point here is that as a couple you get into a certain routine and you will probably end up liking that routine or getting very used to it.

So, imagine the shock you are in for when you break up with your girlfriend and all of a sudden you don’t have a routine.

Some men feel as if it’s like they lose their identity altogether.

In this frantic search for an identity or routine these types of men will zone in on their exes and come to the conclusion that they “can’t live without them.”

Well, the truth is that all these men want is the routine of having a girlfriend. In other words, they don’t really care about their ex on a deep level. They just care about the security of a routine.

What Are Your Chances of Getting Your Ex Girlfriend Back?

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Not having a routine anymore is not a good reason for getting your ex girlfriend back.

Bad Reason #3- I Am Going To Die Without Her

im going to die

Come on… are you serious?

You are not going to die without her.

It may feel like your life is ending inside but the truth is that you aren’t going to stop breathing if you don’t have her. The sun is still going to rise in the east and set in the west tomorrow so get a grip please.

You know what I think of when I hear a grown man say this?

I literally think of a crying girl whose nose is running and who can’t form proper words anymore.

In other words, if you are using this as an excuse as to why you want your ex girlfriend back I am going to have to revoke your man card.

Why is this not a good reason for wanting your ex back?

In my experience, men who make this claim are highly emotional and highly desperate. If you are trying to get your ex girlfriend back and you are coming off as too desperate then you are not stacking the odds in your favor. In fact, I think an argument can be made that you are stacking the odds against yourself.

Getting your ex girlfriend back requires you to be calm, cool, collected but most importantly, not desperate.

Bad Reason #4- Cheating… A LOT


For those of you who are avid readers of Ex Girlfriend Recovery you know my thoughts on cheaters. I don’t like them very much as evidenced here and here. Of course, even I understand that people make mistakes and sometimes deserve a second chance.

You know who doesn’t deserve a second chance?

People who cheat multiple times with multiple different people consistently.

I had a good friend tell me a few years ago why he got divorced from his wife. Apparently, he caught her with his best friend in bed and then learned that she had cheated on him eight different times with eight different men. Now, I don’t know about you but that kind of person doesn’t deserve my friend.

My point here is simple.

If you or your ex girlfriend have cheated on each other a lot then I think its time for the both of you to go your separate ways.


What Are Your Chances of Getting Your Ex Girlfriend Back?

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Have you ever heard that phrase,

History repeats itself…

Well, in this case if you or your ex have cheated on each other a lot it turns out that history has already repeated itself quite a lot.

What’s going to stop it from happening again?

Bad Reason #5- She Is With Someone Else

someone else

Your ex girlfriend is dating someone else…

I have to say this is one of the most painful situations to be in. I mean, no man wants to think of another man with his girl. The mere thought of it is bound to make you angry.

The way he is holding her…

The way he touches her…

Sleeps with her…

Look, I understand that you are angry, upset and hurt and I can even understand why you would want your ex girlfriend back. Sometimes we don’t realize how good we have it with someone until we lose them.

I get it.

In fact, when I say that it’s a bad reason to want your ex girlfriend back if she is with someone else I am not talking specifically about you realizing how good you had it and you making a mistake by letting her go. No, I am talking about that specific segment of men who only want their exes back because they don’t want her to move on at all.

Think of it like this.

Pretend you are a child and you have a favorite toy.

You love this toy. You play with this toy every single day and everything is all great between you and this toy. However, as you get older and you use the toy more you begin to grow bored and tired of it. In fact, one day you get so bored with the toy that you discard it for good.

Well, all of a sudden your little brother takes notice of this toy and starts playing with it.

The more your little brother plays with this toy the more jealous you get and you think to yourself,

“Hey, that’s my toy.”

Eventually, as your brother plays with the toy, you come over start a fight with him and get your toy back.

Ok, so now that you have your toy back everything should be great right?


As you play with your reacquired to you begin to think to yourself,

“Wow, why did I even want this toy back? It’s not even that fun to play with anymore…”

Turns out that the only reason you want the toy back was because someone else was playing with it and you couldn’t stand that thought. Deep down the toy wasn’t going to give you any fulfillment. What you really wanted was for the toy to be locked up so no one could ever play with it.

Do you kind of understand what I am getting at here?

The toy is your ex girlfriend and if the only reason you want her back is because someone else is “playing” with her.

If that is the only reason you want her back then that isn’t going to fly because she isn’t going to fulfill you in the long run.

Bad Reason #6- My Life IS Her

best day life

Ok, I want to make one thing very clear.

Any reason that you cite as a reason to get your ex girlfriend back cannot be desperate. Women can sense that desperation and no woman deep down wants a desperate guy.

In fact, they kind of lose respect for you. Remember, alpha males aren’t desperate.

So, saying something like, she IS my life as a reason for getting her back is not going to be a good reason to get her back. While its a nice sentiment and while it may feel true in your heart its not going to work for you in the “get your ex back game.”

No, you need something stronger and more concrete.

Now, I know what you are wondering.

“Ok Chris, what are some stronger and more concrete reasons for getting your ex girlfriend back?”

I am so glad you asked!

The Good Reasons

(Learn how to get your ex girlfriend back with my book.)

im good meme

In this section I am going to be focusing solely on the good reasons that you should have if you want to get your ex girlfriend back.

Now, one interesting thing that you may find might happen is that you have two good reasons for wanting your ex girlfriend back and one bad reason (it happens.)

The question in that case you are probably wondering is do the good reasons trump the bad?

Well, it really depends on how bad the reason is.

For example, if you want your ex girlfriend back because you miss having sex with her and also wouldn’t mind a friends with benefits relationship with her then you can have all the good reasons in the world for wanting her back but I still wouldn’t give my blessing because to me, using your ex girlfriend for sex is wrong no matter how you argue it.

Now, lets say that you have a lot of good reasons for getting your ex girlfriend back but you also spew out one of those lame, “I am going to die without her” lines.

Well, in this case if your good reasons trump that one bad reason I think we can give you a pass.

So, the point I am trying to get at here is that some of the bad reasons aren’t totally going to impede your progress in getting her back if you have a lot of good reasons for wanting her back. Of course, bad reason #1 and bad reason #4 are going to be tough to get around.

Anyways, enough of this rant.

Lets move on to explaining some of the good reasons.

Good Reason #1- A Circumstantial Breakup


Lets say that you are dating a girl.

She is pretty, sweet, nice and just an all around good person. Your relationship with her is better than it has been with anyone that you have ever dated in your entire life.

There is just one problem…

In a month she is due to move across the country for an amazing job opportunity. You live in happiness until the month is up and then you both agree to part your separate ways.

This is something I like to call a circumstantial breakup.

It’s basically a breakup that occurs because of reasons out of your control.

What are some circumstantial reasons?

  • Someone takes a job opportunity that takes them far away.
  • The two of you are separated due to schools (college.)
  • Someone is forced to move away.
  • Parents prevent you from dating each other.
  • Culture or religious differences (though I will admit this can be hard to overcome.)
  • I think you get the idea…

While this is called a “circumstantial breakup” the circumstances aren’t the only reason that makes this a “good reason” for getting back together with your ex. Notice in the example I gave above that I talked about a couple who was great together. In other words, the relationship between this couple was great before the circumstances forced them apart.

I feel that is a very important aspect here.


Well, imagine for a moment if in that example above instead of a really sweet and nice couple being forced apart by circumstances it was a couple whose relationship was riddled with lies, deceit and cheating. All of a sudden, that relationship isn’t looking like its worth saving anymore is it?

This leads me to my next point..

Good Reason #2- Your Relationship With Your Ex Was Great

love her

What defines a great relationship?

Well, if you ask my opinion I would say a couple with a great relationship would..

  • Be in love.
  • Be able to communicate through any hardships that come their way.
  • Be able to trust each other.
  • Have great sex.
  • Be each others best friends.
  • Feel comfortable with each other.

If you feel you had this type of a relationship with your ex girlfriend then I would say that you have a great reason for wanting her back. Sure, you hit a bit of a speed bump with the breakup and everything but if any relationship is worth trying to save it would be a relationship like the one I listed above.

Now, this brings up a very interesting point.

It could be possible that you think your relationship with your ex was great but if you were to get her perspective she would think it wasn’t so great.

So, I really want you to think very hard about HER perspective of your relationship together not just yours.

If you know for a fact that she felt the same things you did and she thought your relationship was great then I would say you have a very good reason for wanting to get her back.

Good Reason #3- Children Are Involved


I may take some heat for this from some of the more independent thinkers out there but this is really what I believe.

Call me old fashioned but I think when children are involved in between a couple then that couple should do everything in their power to patch things up. The only way that I would think that a couple should not be together if they have children is if one or both members of the couple are repeatedly cheating on each other. Again, I am not fond of cheaters.

Oh, also if someone was abusive either physically or emotionally towards the person. The last thing we want is a child growing up in that type of environment.

Anyways, back to the point.

Having a child is the single most beautiful thing that a man can create with a woman.

Of course, with children comes a drastic change in a relationship between a man and woman. Both members of the relationship almost have to become selfless to accommodate that child’s needs. Some couples transition perfectly into this and others don’t.

In fact, some couples can’t deal with this change.

What changes?

Well, for one men are used to getting all the attention from the woman in the relationship. With the introduction of a child the woman’s attention will be split between her man and her child. Also, sex is most likely not going to happen as frequently and some men don’t take too kindly to this.

If you have a child with your ex and this sounds familiar then you know what I am saying is right on point.

So, why is it a good reason to get your ex girlfriend or wife back if you have children with her?

For one, it is a good thing for your child to have his or her family together. Secondly, at one point you loved your ex so much that you were willing to create a human life for her.

Isn’t that worth saving?

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Chris Seiter	

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