Today we are going to talk about the top five signs that indicate your ex-girlfriend has officially moved on from your relationship.
But these five signs weren’t pulled out of a hat. In fact, the opposite is actually true.
Every sign is based on real life failures I’ve personally witnessed over the past decade of being a coach for brokenhearted individuals.
But enough talk let’s dig in and talk about the top five signs that may indicate your ex-girlfriend has moved on.
Sign #1: Indefinite Silence
The best way to describe this concept is to relate it to a lesson that I learned years ago.
I was about to purchase my first apartment ever, but there was one problem. I did not have any credit whatsoever.
So, when I went to apply, I was immediately denied due to my nonexistent credit history.
When I tried to ease their concerns and said I could just pay for the apartment upfront, they denied me again.
They told me that, believe it or not, having bad credit was actually better than having no credit.
Indefinite silence works this way too.
When it comes to determining if your ex-girlfriend has moved on, an excellent indicator is whether or not they’re talking to you.
If your ex-girlfriend is consistently communicating with you throughout the day, that is a good sign. Even if they are saying mean things to you throughout the day, that’s a good sign.
What you do not want is indefinite silence. In the world of credit history, that equals zero.
For those of you who don’t really know what indefinite silence is then let me give you a quick crash course. A few months ago I actually filmed a video for EGR’s sister site, Ex Boyfriend Recovery. While it’s aimed towards women the definition still applies.
Indefinite silence is essentially when they “ghost you”.
Months will pass by without any communication from her.
She won’t check-in to see how you’re doing, and you will have no way of knowing when or if you will ever hear from her again……because, well, it’s indefinite.
When you reach out to her, you essentially hit a wall, because she does not respond.
If you are living in this indefinite cone of silence with your ex-girlfriend, it is really not a good sign.
It could point to the fact that she has started to move on from your relationship.
Sign #2: She Has Been With Someone New For Longer Than Six Months
This is where things start to get interesting in a complicated way.
The first sign of indefinite silence may seem like common sense.
Someone who isn’t speaking to you likely isn’t interested in you, right?
But what does it mean when your ex is still communicating with you after she has moved on to a new relationship? At what point does that “new relationship” become real?
This is where our user studies come in handy.
When I first started helping people through breakups, it was astounding to me how difficult it was to find accurate research on breakups.
For example, I wanted to know how long a rebound relationship will last?
I went looking for that very answer and found nothing. So, rather than just throw my hands up and resign to the fact that we all may never know, I decided to do the research myself.
I explored every relevant forum, website, and read through the many stories shared in our private ExRecovery Facebook group to study how long rebound relationships last.
I found that sometimes rebound relationships lasted a year and sometimes a week.
However, the average length of time a typical rebound relationship lasted was actually 5.2 months.
What interested me about this study was the realization that it can actually be good when an ex moves on to a new relationship, because of the Grass is Greener Syndrome.
Your ex-girlfriend may have started a new relationship with a guy because she believed he would meet her needs better. But she could soon realize the new relationship falls short and begin missing her relationship with you. This would not occur if she didn’t attempt to move on in the first place.
However, if her new relationship has lasted longer than six months, it is moving out of the rebound relationship territory and into a more serious relationship. If this happens, you may need to consider that she’s moved on.
Sign #3: You Fight Every Time You Talk
Sit back in your seat for a minute. I’m going to give you a quick history lesson on the Ex Recovery brand. Don’t worry, I have a point.
The first website I created was called Ex Boyfriend Recovery, which was designed to help women reunite or move on from their ex-boyfriends. After that site took off, I realized I was ignoring the men who were experiencing the same issues, so I created Ex Girlfriend Recovery.
One of the first theories I instituted in both programs was what I like to call the “Good Feelings vs Bad Feelings Theory“.
Now, I cannot claim that I came up with this out of the blue. In fact, if you really think about it, it is common sense. But here is how the Good Feelings vs Bad Feelings Theory works.
As human beings, we are actually drawn to the people or things that make us feel good and we want to avoid the people or things that make us feel bad.
So, if you lose your temper or your ex-girlfriend loses her temper on you every time you talk, what does that do?
That creates a bad feeling.
And soon she starts to associate you with the bad feeling.
And guess what?
She wants nothing to do with you.
So, if every time you talk with your ex and it starts out cordial before slowing progressing into a huge super smash brothers fight, you have a huge problem.
You have been associating yourself with bad feelings.
Your ex-girlfriend is going to want nothing to do with you or those bad feelings.
She wants to be in the “good feelings” territory.
So, the simple answer is, don’t fight.
Sign #4: Indifference Towards Your Photos Together
Sometimes when I get stumped on content, I rely on my wife.
You can see how it would be helpful to have a woman’s perspective on break-ups and why your ex-girlfriend may be responding a certain way. S
o, I asked my wife about her breakup experience and what she thought was a good sign that an ex-girlfriend has moved on.
She came up with this incredibly insightful sign that I never considered before.
You see, generally speaking, people obsess over photos on social media. They want to know who is liking their photos and they quickly notice if a photo is untagged or removed.
The truth is, if your ex untags or removes photos of you together on social media, this may actually be a good sign.
It relates back to Sign #1: Indefinite Silence, which means that even negative communication is a better than zero communication.
So, realizing that your ex deleted or untagged photos of you together on social media could indicate that your breakup is still on her mind. This is far better than her showing indifference towards your shared photos together on social media.
Let me explain how this may play out in real life.
Let’s say that you and your girlfriend broke up and about six months have passed. You have been working to get her back, because that is what you want, but you consistently fail. You think she must share your feelings, because photos of the two of you together remain on her Facebook profile. Then one day your ex-girlfriend begins a relationship with a new guy and, instead of deleting your photos together, she just starts posting new photos with her new guy.
Why would she do that?
Well, it could be that she is indifferent towards your photos together. They may no longer hold value to her. It could be that she’s forgotten about them, so much so that she doesn’t care enough to delete them.
So, if you are hanging on to hope, because your ex-girlfriend still has photos posted of the two of you together – every single one of them – on Facebook, it may not be the positive sign you thought. It sounds counterintuitive, but it may actually indicate that she’s moved on.
Sign #5: The Total Block Out
This one might need some explaining. Have you heard about my Theory of Blocking?
If not, stop what you’re doing and watch my video on what to do if you’ve been blocked and how to get unblocked by your ex.
Basically, there are two ways of being blocked by an ex.
There is the Full Out Block and the Soft Block.
- The Full Out Block or the hard block is where an ex blocks you from communicating with her in every way imaginable. In this instance, you literally have no way of contacting her and getting a response.
- The Soft Block is where they maybe block your phone number, but you can still communicate with them via Facebook, Snapchat, Instagram, or whatever else in the world you’re using to contact her.
The Total Black Out is totally different than those two things and revolves around the Sphere of Influence.
If you do not know what that is, sit down, you have a little bit of a lesson ahead of you.
The Sphere of Influence
The Sphere of Influence refers to the trusted individuals surrounding your ex-girlfriend. It includes people that she turns to for advice or validation. Their feedback has the power to influence her thought process. The Sphere of Influence is commonly used to describe friends, family members, colleagues, or even people she admires. It includes any individual whose opinion and insight are valued.
Often when an ex-boyfriend experiences a Full Block, he may reach out to an individual in his ex-girlfriend’s Sphere of Influence to communicate with her. But this is where the Total Block Out can occur.
If she has told every single member within her Sphere of Influence not to talk to you for one reason or another, this is a really bad sign. It means, she has totally blocked you out of her life.
Not only has she blocked you from communicating with her directly every way imaginable, but she has even gone through the trouble of asking each of her friends to block you too. This is a strong indication that she has moved on from your relationship.
So, if your ex-girlfriend is giving you one or all of these signs, it’s very likely that she has moved on from your relationship and it may be time for you to do that too.