How To Get Your Ex Girlfriend Back If She Has A New Boyfriend

It’s one of the most horrifying situations to be in as a man…

You and your girlfriend have just broken up. At first you keep telling yourself,

“It’s going to be ok…”

“I can live without her…”

“I don’t need her…”

Of course, as time ticks by you begin to realize just how much she meant to you.  How in love with her you really were. Time has a funny way of making us realize our mistakes and without a doubt letting your ex girlfriend go was a big one.

So, one day you decide to take a chance, to win her back. You figure the easiest way to do this is to send her a non threatening text message to check up on her. So, you do it. You pull out your phone, type in a very non threatening text message, send it to her and you wind up getting a response like this,

Before you sent that text your hopes were so high, you were daydreaming of your future together with her. Of course, after you sent the text that daydream was shattered and replaced with anger, heartache and jealousy.

So, the question you are probably wondering is how the heck are you supposed to navigate a situation like this where you want your ex girlfriend back but she has moved on to a new boyfriend.

Well, that is what this page is here to explore.

How To Get Your Ex Girlfriend Back If She Is Dating Someone New

For years I remember being terrified whenever a client of mine would tell me that they were in this situation.

Why?

Well, it’s because I had seen a lot of successes in “general breakups” but not too many in this particular situation.

But that’s because I didn’t have any type of situation specific protocol to advise men on.

It wasn’t until a couple of years ago I learned about something that completely changed the game when it came to getting exes back with new boyfriends.

And using that new game changing information I started developing a plan that I felt extremely confident in.

But coming up with a great plan is not the same thing as having a plan that works.

So, my team and I started recommending this new plan to the men and the women we worked with and slowly but surely we started noticing significant results.

Over the years we’ve changed things here and there but the core strategy for getting an ex girlfriend back with a new boyfriend remains the same and that’s what I’d like to teach you today,

  1. Know the risks of trying to get her back when she has a boyfriend
  2. Be aware that comparisons will be made
  3. Utilize The No Contact Rule
  4. Re-Establish A Friendship With Your Ex Girlfriend
  5. Try out “The Being There” Method
  6. Begin to build some light attraction in text messages
  7. Invite her to a hang out

Now, before we get started and I begin to dive into explaining the strategy I’d like to make a promise to you (and I do hope you hold me accountable.)

What’s the promise?

Any time I learn something new that can significantly impact your chances I am going to come to this page and update it so that you always have a resource you can trust to stay on top of things.

I started this website in 2013 and I can tell you that dating today is completely different.

Change is the only constant in life and that certainly includes strategies for getting an ex back.

Let’s begin.

1. Know The Risks Of Trying To Get Her Back When She Has A Boyfriend

Men can make a lot of mistakes when it comes to getting an ex girlfriend back.

Heck, they make so many mistakes I even made a video about it,

You know what I have learned through my time working on this site?

Nothing brings a couple together like a common enemy.

For example, you obviously came to this page because you want your ex girlfriend back and she has a new boyfriend. Well, what do you think would happen if the new boyfriend caught wind of the fact that you wanted your girl back?

Do you think he would like that fact?

Men, by nature, are very protective of their women so I guarantee you that to the new boyfriend you trying to get his girlfriend back is going to paint you in a light where you are an enemy.

So, obviously the big risk you run by trying to win your ex girlfriend back in this case is that you could become a common enemy between your ex and her new boyfriend which will ultimately cause them to be closer together.

What Would You Do With...
A Proven System That Allowed You to Attract Any Woman You Wanted (Including Your Ex).
Learn More

Avoid Being A Common Enemy

Being a common enemy between your ex and her new boyfriend is one of the worst positions that you could possibly be in. You must do everything in your power to avoid this position.

I suppose the question you are wondering now is how?

How do you not be a common enemy in a situation where your intentions clearly paint you as an enemy (to the new boyfriend?)

The key here is subtly.

If you can be subtle but effective in your intentions to win your ex girlfriend back you will most likely NOT be looked at by your ex as a common enemy. In fact, what might end up happening is that your ex does all the work for you.

Let me give you an example of how this can work.

Lets say that you are very subtle in your intentions to get your ex girlfriend back but over time your methods start to work. All of a sudden your ex girlfriend starts to get confused about her feelings. You see, on the one hand she has strong feelings for you and on the other hand she has strong feelings for her current boyfriend.

Ideally this is where you want her, confused.

Inevitably she is going to talk to the one person who is supposed to support her and understand her no matter what, her boyfriend.

She may not be completely honest with him about what is going on in her mind but she is going to say things to him to try to test him to see if he is ready for the truth. Of course, sometimes you will get a boyfriend who can tell when something is off without her even having to say a word.

My point is simple.

Eventually the truth is going to come out and how do you think the new boyfriend is going to react to discovering that his girlfriend (your ex) is still hung up on you?

The Answer – Not well…

In fact, a massive fight or breakup might occur and now you are looking like you are in a really good position.

Again, YOU didn’t physically cause this breakup or fight, your ex did because of her feelings for you.

THAT is what we are trying to do here. Of course, the situation you currently find yourself in is one of the hardest to experience as your chances for success are slightly lowered. Allow me to explain.

What This Page Can Do For You

help me help you

I am a very realistic person and I am assuming that you are too.

So, I am not going to sit here and tell you that if you follow every little step I outline on this page that your ex girlfriend is going to break up with her current boyfriend and come running back to you. While that is certainly the outcome that you are praying for it isn’t realistic to assume that, that is going to happen 100% of the time.

Why?

Well, getting an ex girlfriend back isn’t an exact science, it’s an unpredictable one because you are dealing with another human being (your ex) and none of us are mind readers so all of us are a little blind to a certain extent. However, with that being said it doesn’t hurt to have an expert on your side (me) who has seen so many situations and put so many relationships back together that he can drastically increase your chances of succeeding in almost any situation.

Did I lose you?

Ok, let me put this in simpler terms so you really have a good grasp at what this page is going to do for you.

Percentage Example

Imagine for a moment that in every single breakup that occurs between a couple a certain percentage is assigned to it. That percentage correlates to the chance that, that couple has of getting back together.

Lets look at a few situations and assign percentages to them.

(Remember, I am just spit balling here to prove a point so don’t freak out if you find your situation below.)

  • Regular Breakup- 35% chance of getting back together.
  • Breakup Where Someone Cheated- 20% chance of getting back together.
  • Long Distance Couple Breakup- 25% chance of getting back together.
  • Breakup Where Your Ex Moves On- 20% chance of getting back together.

Do you kind of get what I am going for here with the percentages?

You may have noticed that I gave people whose exes have moved on to another man a 20% chance of getting back together. Now, most of you who are in that situation are going to see that number and immediately freak out because it’s pretty darn low.

I mean, a 20% chance of success means that there is an 80% chance of failure.

Well, that 20% number is based on you trying to get your girlfriend back without any of my advice. In other words, this page is meant to improve that 20% chance of success.

Ok, imagine this for a moment.

Imagine that you follow the advice on this page and get to a place where your ex girlfriend is confused about her feelings for you and her new boyfriend. Well, all of a sudden that 20% chance of success is bumped up to 50% because you know eventually she is going to have to choose between you and her new boyfriend.

In other words, this page is meant to drastically increase your chances for success!

So, lets get started.

2. Be Aware That Comparisons Are Going To Be Made

comparions

I have always found it fascinating that human beings have this need to compare things.

For example, today I was watching a movie and inevitably found myself thinking,

“The sequel to this was so much better.”

The movie was actually Batman Begins (I like Batman what’s the big deal?)

Anyways, I think it’s safe to say that your ex girlfriend is going to be comparing her relationship with her new boyfriend to her relationship with you. Now, this can either work in your favor or work against you. Obviously we are hoping that the new boyfriend is treating her horribly so you look like a prince but lets just say that, that doesn’t happen. Let’s go to the worse case scenario (for you) where the new boyfriend is treating her incredibly well.

How are you supposed to get her back then?

If Her New Boyfriend Treats Her Well

Before I really dive in to the details on this one perhaps I should define what I mean by your ex girlfriends new boyfriend “treating her well.”

When I think of a boyfriend treating a girlfriend well I don’t so much think of a guy opening doors and pulling out chairs (that’s still important thought) but I am thinking of something that is much deeper. I am talking about someone who provides emotional support, someone who listens and tries not to judge, someone who truly cares about her and she realizes it.

If your ex girlfriends new boyfriend does that during their relationship and you didn’t during yours with her then when she is going to make the comparison between you and her new guy she is definitely going to think the new guy is better and that is going to put you at a disadvantage.

Why?

Because usually a girl who has a better guy isn’t going to leave him to put herself back in a situation where she is treated poorly.

However, as I am sure you have realized there are situations where this does happen. Would you like to know how it happens?

One of the biggest assets I can bring to you with this page is my experience in dealing with thousands of couples. You see, I have a sister site to this one called, Ex Boyfriend Recovery, where I have helped thousands of women. I think it’s safe to say that I have heard just about every single story there is when it comes to breakups.

You want to know what always shocks me?

That some of these women want their exes back even after they have done HORRIBLE things to them.

For example, there was once a girl that came to my other site, Ex Boyfriend Recovery, who was dating a new guy but wanted her ex back even though he cheated on her six times with six different women. If I was in her position I would be screaming for his head but she wasn’t…

No, she was screaming for another reason, because she wanted him back.

So, what did this guy (who had done horrible things to her in the past) have that drew her in so much that she wanted to leave her perfectly good boyfriend?

A lot of you will probably point to the “bad boy” theory in which women are drawn to a “bad boy” of which this ex boyfriend of hers was clearly.

At first that was what I thought but the more I talked to her about her particular situation I began to realize that there was something else going on in her head.

Determined to find out I decided to just ask her what made her want him back.

Her answer was quite simple,

The Connection

In other words, even though some women find themselves in a situation where they are clearly better off relationship wise sometimes the appeal of the connection can trump everything.

For example, if your ex girlfriend has a new boyfriend that treats her like a queen she may still be more drawn to you because she has a connection with you that the new boyfriend can’t top.

So, if you were to ask me how to get your ex girlfriend back in a situation where she has moved on and her new man treats her well then I would say you would have to hit her where she will be affected most, her romantic feelings for you. You will need to find a way to get her to tap into those feelings for you and when she does that is going to dramatically increase your chances of having her run back to you.

If Her New Boyfriend Does NOT Treat Her Well

This is the ideal situation you are hoping to be in.

Like I said, a comparison between you and the new guy is eventually going to happen no matter what it just a question of when.

Well, lets pretend that your ex girlfriend has been dating her new boyfriend for 2 months exactly. By now she knows him well enough to know what he is about. If she finds herself thinking something like,

“Wow, my new boyfriend couldn’t hold a candle to my last one.”

Then that is a very good sign because it means you are winning the comparison battle against her new guy. Humans in general are drawn to things that make them feel good and flee from things that make them feel bad.

Food is a perfect example of this.

Given the choice between a chocolate cake and spinach I am going to pick chocolate cake 100% of the time because it tastes/makes me feel good as opposed to spinach which has the opposite effect.

If your ex girlfriends new boyfriend isn’t treating her the way a woman should be treated in a relationship then she could soon be maneuvering to go back to the thing that makes her feel better than anything, YOU!

How Grass Is Greener Syndrome Play A Role

grass

Believe it or not but your ex girlfriend moving on may actually be a good thing in the long run.

Sometimes women can get something called the grass is greener syndrome (GIGS.) It’s basically this idea that they can get in their head that even though they could be really happy with you they think they could do better than you. This idea compels them to break up with you and look elsewhere to find that “perfect match.”

Now, GIGS is very hit or miss.

For example, if your ex girlfriend breaks up with you and starts dating someone new who treats her really well like we talked about in the comparison section above your exes GIGS is going to be verified and as a result it is going to be much harder to get her back.

Of course, the GIGS can also work in your favor big time. If your ex broke up with you because she thought she could do better and discovers that she can’t then all of a sudden she is going to be scrambling to get YOUR approval.

I want you to be aware that the GIGS exists and could have been a possible reason for the breakup between you and your ex.

3. Utilize The No Contact Rule

no eye contact

Those of you who are avid readers of my site have probably read this guide and this guide. In those particular guides I talk a lot about the importance of the no contact rule.

But in case you were wondering what the no contact rule was,

The No Contact Rule- A certain period of time where you purposefully cut off all communication to your ex girlfriend.

Oh, and here’s a video explaining what it is in case you aren’t much of a reader and more of a visual learner,

Now, I know what you are thinking.

“Do you really mean I need to cut off ALL communication with her?”

I do.

However, there are certain situations where you can’t cut off all communication. For example,

  • What are you supposed to do if you live with your ex?
  • What about if you work with them?
  • Share children together?

The list goes on and on.

Since explaining what to do in those particular situations might take too long and get us away from the purpose of this article I’d like to recommend you read to get a briefing on what you are supposed to do about it.

So, operating on the assumption that we are going do a strict no contact where we don’t talk to our ex at all after the breakup how long are we going to be doing it for?

How Long Should I Do No Contact For?

Usually I recommend a 21, 30 or 45 day no contact rules in most situations.

So what is best for this situation?

Well, when I originally wrote this article back in 2014 you could see that I clearly erred on the side of caution,

If you find yourself in a situation where you are trying to get a girlfriend back who has a new boyfriend you may find that waiting 45 days in no contact is too long. I mean, that is 45 days that your ex girlfriend has with her new boyfriend to do all sorts of things (which I know you don’t want to think about.)

I have thought a lot about this and I think that this is one of those situations where a brief 2 week no contact rule is ok (that is 14 days for those of you who can’t count.)

But it’s been over four years since I wrote those words and after more research and success do I still believe a 14 day rule is the best?

Hmm…. I am not quite sure.

Typically speaking there are two lines of thought on the length of time you should be waiting after the no contact rule,

  1. You Don’t Want To Give Your Ex And Her New Man Too Much “Alone Time”
  2. By Giving Them A Little More Time It Gives Them A Chance To Get Over The Honeymoon Period

So, what’s the best approach?

Let’s explore each of these thoughts.

Thought #1: You Don’t Want To Give Your Ex And Her New Man Too Much Alone Time

One of the greatest fears for men who enter into the NC rule during this situation is that their exes are going to get so close to their new man that they will completely forget about their old one. While I am not a fan of becoming overbearing or annoying I don’t think there is anything wrong with doing very subtle things to remind your ex that you are out there.

How can I best explain this?

Ok, imagine if you completed your no contact rule and called your ex and begged for her back. Not only is this needy and desperate but it is too big of a statement too soon. Instead if you did subtle things like liking a picture on Facebook then your ex is going to sit there and wonder,

“Oh my god he liked my photos! He never liked anything when we were together?”

While it is a far cry from her thinking,

“I want him back.”

It’s a start because you have her thinking about you.

This leads me to my next point.

Thought #2: By Giving Them A Little More Time It Gives Them A Chance To Get Over The Honeymoon Period

We’ve already talked a lot about comparisons being made above so lets assume that you start liking your exes stuff when she’s in the middle of the honeymoon period with her new guy.
Instead of thinking,

“He liked my photos!”

She might be thinking,

“I hate him so much.”

Timing is an important concept for you to grasp here because if your ex is in the midst of a honeymoon period with her new guy whenever you start to try anything it might be met with a very cold disposition.

Now compare that to reaching out or doing something subtle like liking a photo on Facebook when things aren’t going so well between her and the new guy.

All of a sudden you can make a lot more progress, can’t you?

Some of you may be wondering where I came up with this and for me to fully explain that I have to tell you a story.

A few months ago my wife and I took on a project, a woman whose ex left her for another woman.

Needless to say, she was devastated.

It’s not quite the same exact situation as you but it’s incredibly close.

Originally whenever I’d take on a project like this, in this situation, I’d recommend shorter no contact time frames but I thought I’d do something a bit different this time.

I recommended a standard 21 day no contact rule.

I wanted to see what would happen.

Well, around 7 days into her no contact rule she ended up breaking down and contacted him.

After a scolding from me I told her that she’d have to do the 21 day rule over from it’s start.

This time she actually completed it but we noticed that her ex was still being “lovey dovey” with the new girl.

So, I thought I’d make things really interesting and tell her to do another set of the no contact rule, 21 days.

When it was all said and done our little project had done 49 days of no contact before she reached out.

And to cut an incredibly long story short she ended up getting her ex back!

Here’s my point.

When “the project” got through the no contact rule for the first time she ended up getting a very cold response from her ex when she did reach out.

Her ex was still very much into the other woman.

It wasn’t until he had been given enough time to come down off of cloud nine before she made any type of progress.

What’s The Best Time Frame?

Our research suggests that on average it is going to take you anywhere from 3 to 6 months to get your ex girlfriend back.

That figure becomes even greater if your ex is with someone new.

So, overall I’d say the best approach is to do a minimum of at least 45 days of no contact so that your ex has enough time to come down off of cloud nine.

4. Re-Establish A Friendship With Your Girlfriend

friendship

There is one thing I know about myself really well when it comes to relationships.

I am NOT ok with a woman being friends with her ex or talking to her ex every single day.

I know that may sound a little controlling or possessive but the truth is I honestly don’t care at this point. Perhaps I am a bit jaded because I have seen so much with regards to exes and I know that any time that exes are friends it usually doesn’t work out.

Of course, I would like to get your take on this.

Would you be ok with a girl you are dating or married to being close friends with her ex?

Hmm.. let me twist the knife a bit for you.

Imagine that your new (made up) girlfriend is best friends with her ex. Someone who used to sleep with her, who used to touch her in all the ways you get to. Your girlfriend talks to her ex every single day and he provides her with emotional support (support that is supposed to come from you.)

Would you be ok in a situation like that?

98% of men won’t.

I’ll admit that I certainly wouldn’t be ok with a situation like that.

So, how can we use this knowledge to our advantage?

By becoming your exes friend of course!

Become One Of Her Friends

Right now your goal isn’t going to be to get your ex girlfriend back.

I know that may sound weird and counterproductive but if you really think about it, it’s not.

Like I said above, it is very rare for a man to be ok with the fact that his girlfriend or wife is good friends with her ex. Well, once your exes new man catches wind that you and your ex are on speaking terms again (and friends no less) he isn’t going to be too happy and this is going to cause friction between him and his girlfriend (your ex.)

In other words, you becoming friends with your ex is going to cause your exes new man to go absolutely ballistic when he finds out that she is talking to you and this is what you want. You want HIM to do all the work in making you look like a star.

Provide Emotional Support

Providing emotional support for your ex girlfriend (when you become friends) is really where you are going to shine. If you can get her to open up to you and trust you enough to let you in then I guarantee that you are going to come out looking like a star.

Think of it this way.

If she can’t get the emotional support she needs from her own boyfriend but from you then when she makes that inevitable comparison between you and the new guy she is going to take that into account.

Now, I don’t want you to be fooled. When I talk about providing emotional support I am not talking about helping her with her own relationship. I don’t want you to even mention her new boyfriend at all. If she asks you for relationship advice on him I want you to decline as politely as possible.

However, anything else requiring emotional support you are definitely her man.

5. Try Out The Being There Method

I’d like to piggy back off of step four above and talk now about what I consider to be a game changer for your situation.

Above I made mention of the fact that I wouldn’t be ok if a girl I was dating was constantly talking to her ex.

That’s where the “being there method” comes into play.

What is the being there method?

Being There Method: As long as you are a constant presence throughout your exes life it will create enough annoyance in the new guy to cause the downfall of their relationship. But perhaps the most brilliant part about this strategy is that it forces your ex to choose between the new guy and you.

That is why it’s so important to wait until your ex has come down off the honeymoon period before you try this out because that’s when she is more likely to side with you.

Now, before I unpack the definition I’d first like to talk about how this is kind of a strategy that is morally grey.

This Is Morally Grey But It Works Better Than Anything I’ve Found!

You may not know this about me but I have a private Facebook Group for people who are going through breakups.

One of the things I like to do for them are Facebook Lives.

This is where, for an hour, I will stream live and answer questions.

Here’s a screenshot so that you can visualize what I am talking about,

About a year ago I remember I was doing one of these lives and a real therapist who happened to be in the group was watching.

(Believe it or not but it happens)

Anyways, someone had asked about what to do in a situation “new person” when I started talking about the being there method and how great it was.

Well, the therapist watching rightly pointed out that everything about it was wrong and that you shouldn’t interfere with a relationship like this.

Can you see where this is going?

She dug in and defended her position and I dug in and defended my position and everyone got treated to a show for ten minutes.

After the experience I literally when I was left to my own thoughts I began to agree with the therapist.

Everything about this strategy is wrong.

You shouldn’t knowingly interfere with your exes relationship.

It’s manipulation at it’s finest.

But here’s the thing.

I get hired to come up with strategies like this for a living. Someone will pay me money and ask,

“Chris, I don’t care what it is just help me get her/him back!”

And so off I go trying to figure out the problem.

Here’s the thing.

When it comes to getting an ex girlfriend back who is with someone new the worst thing you can do is just sit around and do nothing.

You have to do something.

And that’s where the being there method comes into play.

Now, am I saying to try to get your ex to cheat?

No.

All I am saying is that you need to become a constant presence for her.

She needs to talk to you a lot.

Monopolize her time.

But let’s not forget the fact that technically this is manipulation and it is definitely in that morally grey area.

It works though.

Better than anything I’ve ever seen.

So, if you are ok with that then lets proceed.

Monopolize Her Time And Indirectly Make Her Choose

The goal here isn’t to step over any lines that you aren’t supposed to cross. It’s simply that you are competing with her new guy for her time.

The more time you can get her to spend talking to you the better.

Have you ever heard of a causality chain?

It’s sort of my own little creation but I love them.

Basically it’s a cause and effect graphic.

I’d like to show you one right now.

Now, do you see what the being there ultimately leads to when you look at it’s cause and effects?

It leads to an ultimatum from the new guy.

And everyone hates ultimatums.

That’s the brilliant part about this strategy. By simply “being there” it forces the new guy to force your ex girlfriend into a choice and if you do enough of what I am going to talk about next your ex ideally should choose you.

6. Build Attraction In Text Messages

attraction

What have we done so far?

Well, we’ve done a shortened version of the no contact rule (14 days to not give your ex and her new man a lot of alone time together.) We have also worked on re-establishing a friendship with her so that you can provide her with emotional support and her new boyfriend may cause a few fights over it.

I guess the question you are wondering now is what do you do after this point?

Well, at this point I would SLOWLY build attraction.

What Do I Mean By Slowly?

A big mistake I see a lot of men making is the fact that they jump into the deep end instead of wading into the shallow one when it comes to building attraction.

Look, calling a girl up and asking her out right on the spot is a high risk proposition.

Why?

Because absolutely zero attraction has been built. There is no chemistry. There is no build up or romance. Women love to be romanced. They love it when a man works for their attention. So, as you can see just calling a girl up and asking her out without any of the romance or build up doesn’t usually work.

So, when I say go slowly when you build attraction in text messages I mean become a master at the art of “building up.”

An Example Of The Perfect Build Up

Examples are best for explaining this type of stuff.

Ok, lets say that you are trying to get your ex girlfriend back and she has just gotten a new boyfriend. You have come to this page and have implemented everything perfectly so far. You have done a shortened NC rule, you have worked on re-establishing your friendship with your ex. Eventually the new boyfriend got so upset about this that it has caused a bit of a rift in their relationship.

Well, obviously the next step for you is to work on building attraction. Of course, in order to do that successfully you have to create this build up to gain the attraction momentum that you need. What I want to do now is to show you how you should go about creating this perfect build up.

I am a fan of a subtle build up with text messages which eventually lead to phone calls which eventually lead to a face to face meeting.

So, to give a quick recap.

  • First you do a subtle build up of attraction with text messages.
  • After enough attraction is built you can move on to conversations on the phone.
  • Finally after you build attraction on the phone you can ask your ex out for a “hang out.”

Now, I realize that this is a birds eye view of what you are supposed to be doing. What you are probably wondering is what you should be doing when you text her. How do you build the attraction needed?

Well, that is a very complex subject that will literally take me 8,000 words to explain. Luckily, I have already written those 8,000 words here.

Using the guide in the link above you should be able to properly build attraction with the build up technique.

7. Set Up A “Hang Out”

hang out

This is really your first BIG test.

You have done the NC rule.

You have become your exes friend and provided her with emotional support.

You have rebuilt some of the attraction you used to have with her.

Well, now is the time to test and see if that hard work paid off. I want you to ask her for a casual hang out. This isn’t supposed to be a date. It’s just supposed to be two friends catching up. Now, a really good girlfriend wouldn’t see her ex boyfriend out of respect for her new boyfriend.

So, don’t take it personally if your ex declines your offer to meet up for a hang out.

It doesn’t mean you can’t get her back. It just means that she is being a good girlfriend to her boyfriend and she shouldn’t be punished for that. Keep building the attraction until she chooses to leave her current man in favor of the better option, you.

What It Means If She Accepts The Hang Out

If she accepts your offer to hang out then that means something important.

It means she doesn’t respect her boyfriend feelings enough to not hang out with you.

Why is this important?

Because a woman who is truly in love with a man wouldn’t do anything to jeopardize that relationship. She wouldn’t hang out with her ex boyfriend, she wouldn’t talk romantically to anyone else. She would be completely committed to that relationship.

Luckily for you, if she accepts your offer for a casual hang out, it means that she doesn’t care enough about her current boyfriends feelings to not hang out with you.

Now, I don’t know about you but that is a very good sign for you!

Conclusion

Hey guys I just want you to know I had a blast writing this article!

Writing something this long tends to be difficult because you run out of gas as you get deeper and deeper into it.

Nevertheless, if I missed something or you want to ask me anything please do so in the comments.

My team and I will personally answer you.

We promise!

		

Written by EGR team mate

Chris Seiter

Leave a Reply

2929 Comments on "How To Get Your Ex Girlfriend Back If She Has A New Boyfriend"

avatar
  Subscribe  
newest oldest
Notify of
Nandan
Guest
Hi chris, I have opted for EXGR PRO and started today NC rule. Today afternoon onwards i started ignoring my EX-GF. Now i mean at 11.30pm she started calling and sending me chat msgs continue and i disconnected her fone cals and refused messaging her. She is very upset and sending me messages that plz dnt make me cry coz so far in my 2 years relationship i never ignored her like this before even after breakups.She want talk to me atleast for 1 min but i am sure if i answer i wont be able to give her anser… Read more »
Nandan
Guest
Chris, Just now I talked to her and told i want to meet the expectations she is expecting from a partner and be like a man in front of her.But she says she has already taken her decision not to marry me. What i am doing wont change her decision. She says she want to be happy and me also to be happy.So better not to talk to each other. She want to live her life and me my. She said we will remain friends and will be with me in problems in future. She will always be with me… Read more »
Mike
Guest
Hi. I completed no contact, been working on myself to become more confident and attractive, started contact by text to build some attraction. We even met once, although accidentaly, and I think there was a good vibe. She said she would like us to stay friends and that we should meet some day. A few days later though I got a message from her (and from her new boyfriend). He doesn’t like it we are in touch, so she told me we won’t be in any contact anymore. Aside from working on myself even more and using social media to… Read more »
Mike
Guest

Thanks for the encouragement. I know she is not the only game in my life, in fact I am seeing other people and having fun. Things are going pretty well from any point of view, actually, but regardless, I still feel like a huge hole within my soul.
How exactly should I deal with it, since they told me cleary to not be in touch tough? Perhaps an other NC and then starting by sending a message once every week or two, for example?

Mike
Guest

How do you suggest I should get in touch in this situation? Contacting her directly (i.e. the “I saw something that reminded me of you” kind of text), or in an inderect way (i.e. just asking something, and then adding something like “how are you doing, by the way?”).
Also, I see sometimes her friends and family, would it be a good or bad idea to ask them about her or tell them to say hi from me?

Mike
Guest

What would be a good “reason” to get in touch. I.e. important days, holidays, and such? For example a little wish for the holiday, and then asking how she is doing? Or would it be better in a mundane setting (i.e. “there is this new kind of food product at the store, i think you will like it. How are you doing, by the way?”

Thomas
Guest
Hello, me and my girlfriend brake up after 8 years. We also lived together from first day (8 years lived together). The love was great and big. Connection was really great and special. I’m 34 and she is 33. We broke up one time for 2 months but every day we see each other and we started relationship again. After one year we broke again but we decided to split only to find ourselves because we did not lost our love. After 8 months of NC we started to texting and she told me that she can’t live without me… Read more »
Thomas
Guest

Can you give me some free tips how I can get her back? What metod shuld I use?

Mark
Guest
I need to start by saying I work with my ex. I’ve done the no contact period and we’ve now been texting, taking in person and phone now and then and also been on a few really fun hangouts/drinks etc. She’s seeing her ex, which I know but she doesn’t know I know. We’ve also had discussions about each of our ‘feelings’ toward each other still. We have insane chemistry but I’ve not made any moves yet as I didn’t want to blow it, but I have a feeling a kiss would be well received. With her ex still in… Read more »
Ankit
Guest
Hi, I am currently in phase “His ex has knows we are talking and had seen our pics together hanging out”. But his ex is calm. He is showing no anger or jealousu, but became taking extra care for her. She also wants to leave him, but he does not give any reason. He become so calm in this situation. I became so irrated that this is the right time, leave him now. But she is like, he is giving no reaction. I started NC, to give me how could you leave him now since he is not even mad… Read more »
Thanapong (AKA. Tom)
Guest
So, my problem is that I’ve been in rebound relationship for like a month before I decided that I still miss my ex way too much for the relationship become the serious. I decided to broke up with my rebound relationship few days ago, and started working on getting my ex back. My ex is in a long distance relationship right now and I’m not sure if it’s a rebound relationship or not (maybe I’m just being a denial pathetic). The BIG problem is that my ex know that I have a new relationship when I was in a rebound… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

nope.. avoid the postcard, it’s still intimate and it might cause her bf to tell her to stop talking to you. Text or call her in a time that you are both free. Even if it’s just once a day, if it’s good, that’s ok.

Emilie
Guest
Hello, I am a girl, who was in a relationship with another girl for 9 years. She left me 2 months ago. Right after she left me, she started to sleep with another girl, and now they apparently have developed feelings for each other and they are dating and being in a relationship. The girl is really not like me at all, her personality is exactly the opposite of mine, and I find it weird that my ex would be attracted to this kind of person. Anyway… I want to get her back sooo much…I did some bad things after… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Emilie,

Start the count of 30 day nc from the last time you initiated contact and replied. Don’t just wait. Be active in improving yourself and in posting in social media. Initiate contact after nc and continue doing what you’re doing during nc while slowly building rapport.

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor
That means not greeting her and her son during nc.. You can send a clean slate message before nc, tell her being friends right now is not working out for you and then thank her for everything but don’t tell her about nc. don’t rush things.. and focus more in improving yourself and having your own life. Take it slow in building rapport and don’t overthink about things you cannot control like her bf being there.. Just focus on what impression you want to make when you text, call or meet.. Texts first, then calls, and then meet ups. Since… Read more »
JT
Guest
We had gone on and off and finally cut it off about a year ago… she quickly moved on and later we had a paternity battle. He had been in her life but they didn’t have a ton of time. After the paternity test they had gone on some trips together, then during the holidays it seemed to die down a bit. Now that we have gotten past the holidays, which we had good standing it seemed, she even let me rub her feet and touch her, which when dating her first rebound was something she would shy away from.… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor
Hi JT, That’s good that you’re kind to her and the kids, and you said that you’re improving yourself but if you have to avoid looking like you’re just there waiting. If you only build rapport and don’t have mystery, or she doesn’t feel regret in not having your in her life, then she will take you for granted. Go out on a date. Don’t always be there but when you are make it the best. I just want to make it clear, did you mean you it turned out you don’t have a child together? and how long have… Read more »
Jt
Guest
No, we have 2 kids together. She seems content and seems to enjoy having this guy around, they don’t get to spend a ton of time together, but always gets to take her places right now. I’m trying to not let it get to me, that’s hard due to how quickly she ended us and jumped onto that. Rapport was going well but like I said, I feel she’s intrigued by having this relationship due to it being like she’s getting away with something. Almost just to rub salt in the wounds. I’m trying now just to be distant for… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

that means you lack mystery and interest for her.. I don’t want to sound discouraging but you have to focus more in yourself and being great and also use the time with your kids to your advantage as well. Go out with your kids and have fun, so that when they talk to her and say how much they had fun with you, it could help make her miss you more and being with the kids and you as family again.

collin martindale
Guest
Whats up guys? So i was with my ex for just under 3 years (3 years on Feb. 22) . She is the type of girl that was really attached to me. Like tell me she “misses me already” an hour after spending time together. It was a really good relationship. I opened a business in December and started to neglect her a little. At the time we were starting to talk about moving in together and starting a life together. About three weeks ago she tells me that she doesn’t feel the same anymore and she’s starting to have… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Collin,
You can still restart nc and do it right if you want to but you have to do it right because the more you do it, the less it can help you.

Ken
Guest
I fell in love with this girl in high school nothing serious we held hands but I turned her off and she soon started dating her best friend a month after the fight we had. I never got too close, Hell we just held hands and talked and walked. I really I miss her and I want another chance. We kept each other up hours on end just talking about passions we had. We were quite similar but I was a little too controlling. I learned in hindsight that you should not EVER try to change or influence someone’s religious… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Ken,

Have you tried approaching her to say hi?

Larry
Guest

I have actually tried some of the methods listed here, and now she finally believes we can only be best of friends. But the love is what I need not being friends with who I love… Please help from here

Larry
Guest

I have actually tried some of the methods listed here, and now she finally believes we can only be best of friends. But the love is what I need not being friends with who I love… Please help from here

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Larry,

When and how did you do it?

Alex
Guest
Hello I recently purchased ex gf recovery and I believe my situation is different then the book because my ex and I work together. I tried emailing support a bunch and received nothing so I thought I would post my question here. So I am confident my ex is now in a rebound relationship. When we talk at work everything is fun and she laughs but she keeps saying how the new guy doesn’t want her talking to me. We even spent a whole day with each other the whole time. How do I get her to continue talking to… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Alexx,

There’s a section in this post about working with your ex:
Using The No Contact Rule (Everything You Need To Know)

Alex
Guest

Thanks for the article itd a good read, but I feel like I am past the NC phase and me and my ex are on talking terms. She told me she lives with her rebound and his roommates but she will still occasionally text me whether he’s home or not. My question is how do I continue to show her I can be her friend and support her while also working toward a relationship again?

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

why do you say you’re past the nc phase? If you’ve done it, how long and how much did you improve yourself and are you still improving yourself as of now?

Ross
Guest

I already did everything that it says here, but she doesn’t want to give up on him. Although he is beginning to show that he is losing interest in her, he does not end it and my ex continues to insist. What should I do from now on?

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

How did you know all of those? Did you ask her?

John
Guest
Hi. I broke up with my girlfriend at the end of the summer. We kind of drifted and it wasn’t a bad breakup, but during those months up until November, she and I still texted occasionally and saw each other a couple of times. Wished her a Happy Thanksgiving among other things. I knew we were both trying to date, but in mid-December, I reached out to her as I was missing her a great deal and wanted to thank her for all the good things she’s done for me and apologize the things I haven’t done. It was at… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi John,

The poem was too forward.. You can still try nc for the last time if you want.. This time do 45 days and take it slow in building rapport after it.

james
Guest
Me and my girlfriend dated for about 2 years. We broke up in november as we had problems most was my fault as being needy, insecure. anyways she started seeing a guy the day of the breakup (they met 3 days before the breakup) and they still date now. I took about a month on NC. Went out and work out and still do. about around Christmas she reached out using my stuff as a conversation starter. On christmas she wished me and texted my mother separately to wish us a merry Christmas. Same as New Years. 2 weeks ago… Read more »
james
Guest

she also never says “boyfriend” or his name. When shes busy she always says like “im hanging out with someone”. or when she broke her phone screen and she called me to tell me she got it fixed and she said yeah it was like $85 but someone paid the other half. See she always says someone and never calls him by his name with me or says boyfriend.

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi James,

that’s good.. keep building rapport slowly while continuing improving yourself.

Jimea
Guest
Me and my ex dated for 1.5 years and we’re really close and best friends. We had fought a good amount but at the end of the day, really loved eachother. It started when I had to leave for my first semester in college. I was very paranoid that we were going to be away. She commuted to college and I was 4 hrs away. I ended up getting very paranoid and clingy before we broke up and didn’t show her that I trusted her when I really did. We fought when I was at school because of that. One… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Jimea,

I think you should do 45 days.. Be active in improving yourself and in posting.

Jimea
Guest

Does I have a real shot though? Isn’t 45 days a long time in which she will grow closer to her new boyfriend? What concrete steps will actually make a difference.

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

It’s a small chance. you’ve been chasing her for 4 months now, the only thing that could help increase your chances is that you won’t seem like you’re going to do that again, that’s why I recommended a 45 day period.

Jimea
Guest

Yesterday she said that he was just a friend but she invited me to go bowling with her and her friends. He was also there. I had a fun time but this was our first time hanging out since our breakup. I don’t exactly understand. She says he’s just a friend but I feel like there is more, yet she still invites me to hangout with them and friends. He sees her more than I am able to so how can I put myself in a better position.

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

That’s why you need to do nc.. You’ve been friendzoned at this point. She’s not going to miss you and there will be no sense of losing you if you’re always there.

Jeff
Guest

To clarify, all the times we’ve spoke since I learned of her new boyfriend have been over the phone and not by text message. Thanks for your help!

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Jeff,

You said you haven’t spoken in a month, how much did you improve yourself and how active were you in posting in that month and currently?

Jeff
Guest

I’ve improved myself a lot. And I have not posted at all, as I do not have social media accounts nor do I view her social media pages.

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

extend for a week or two and do posts first before initiating because that’s your indirect way of showing your improvement and increasing your perceived value, and for her to think that you’re not chasing her.. So, that if she gets curious once you initiate contact, she will see them.. better if you add mutual friends.

Jeff
Guest
My ex-girlfriend and I dated for almost two years. The first year was non-exclusive and the second year was completely exclusive. We were both very in love and often told each other that. We were also best friends and told each other everything. Since I was planning to move across the country for a one-year graduate school program in August, we agreed a few months before then that when I left we would end our relationship. Well, I was gone for a month before deciding to leave the program and move back home. In the month that I was gone,… Read more »
Chris
Guest
Hey, I was with my girlfriend for almost 7 years. Last year she met a new guy, typical alpha male, who had almost everything that I didn’t have – he was very open to others, he was surprising her every time, he has good job, a car.. Didn’t mention he is few years older. She fell in love with him and after few arguments she decided to abandon the contact with him and to try again with me. We spend wonderful summer, but then when we started our studies in different cities she renew a contact with him and ensured… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Chris,

Be active in posting in social media.. and aside from not initiating, don’t reply in her messages or comments in your posts if she does..

Brandon
Guest

I’m a tad confused …my ex comes over we hang out regularly spend time together with our kids watch tv and even sleep together ….but I can’t get her to open up about anything…our kids or herself is a no go for talking …ive done no contact and I catch her smiling at me like she used to…what can I do to bridge the rift between us and bring us closer together

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Brandon,

How many days have you done nc and how much did you improve yourself?

Andrew
Guest
Hello, so my ex or the girl I was dating split up with me 2 weeks ago. She was dating a guy that was manipulative and verbally abusive but there emotionally for her. They broke up in August .She left him because he was crazy and controlling! She got with me this december and it felt real and she said it was but the whole time she was telling me her how her ex texts her are all the time and gets her mad and upset. She split up with me because she said she was confused and I was… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Yup, tell her being friends is not workable for you now and then start at least 21 days nc

Robin M
Guest
I met this girl about 3 years ago. We noticed we had a lot in common. However she was dating a neglectful guy at the time. He was barely even there. She even admitted after a while that she had strong feelings for me, but she is too loyal to ever break up with someone, regardless of what they do. Anyways, fastforward about a year in which we became very good friends and he breaks up with her. I had been dating someone else in that same year, but we broke up a few months before. The spark between me… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Robin m,

You’re doing it the right way, just take it slow in building rapport

daymon young
Guest

Sorry for the misspellings… Damn auto-correct

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

her dating life right now, frankly, is none of your business.. but I understand that you wanted to know because you’re trying to get her back.. but in her perspective, she’s not obligated to tell you and that it would be awkward too because you’re exes.. just keep slowly rebuilding rapport.

daymon young
Guest

You have to admit though it will be an awkward meeting. As I feel it will happen, when the shit hits the fan it’s going to be very funky and I want to be as clean as possible. I doubt she or he knows that I know and I feel her not telling me could work in my favor. I’m going to keep up what I have until then. But if anything happens its on her hands, not mine…thanks

MAP
Guest
Me(32) her (28) We dated 2 years, half of which was long distance because of my career. We have been on the mend for 3 months, broken up for 2 months officially-today. I am getting better when I can but I do still think about her a lot. I have started therapy and cross-fit and took on a new job. In these 2 months….she has rented out a new place, moved, and moved on as well to a new guy. They started about 3 weeks after we were done, so they are almost at a month now. It was a… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Map,

if you meant, you’re going to rebuild rapport slowly after nc period, yes, that’s right.

MAP
Guest

We have done no-contact for 60ish days besides the exchanging of belongings. When I returned her stuff today she decided to not be there and left the door open for me. Im not sure if you meant build rapport after another period of No Contact? won’t that just give them more time to develop even more together and then completely move on..assuming she already hasn’t. I am lost on your response, but thank you.

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

nope, I meant you can try to slowly build rapport after nc.. if you’ve done nc already, then start building rapport.

daymon young
Guest
Hi… Me and my experience were together for 10 years and we have 3 boys together. When we broke up it was after an argument and big MI’s understanding and was made worse by her mother and the fact I didn’t have a chance to talk to her. She went to work and didn’t return. She works dayss and I work nights. The next day I went to sleep that morning as usual and was awakened by knocking on the door. It was her, her mom and the police. I asked what was going on and her mom wouldn’t let… Read more »
ZM
Guest
Long post coming. Back in May in my home country in Europe I met an Asian girl who was working in my country for a few months. We fell in love immediately even though we knew she was going to go back to her country in July. To make things worse, I found out she had “some sort of boyfriend” (her words) back home. I should have walked away but couldn’t and neither could she. Long story short, she went back home, I went to her country to visit her, acted all desperate and needy, she made her choice, things… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi ZM,

you already tried to explain what happened, so you just need to focus in improving yourself and being in active in posting right now because that’s what you can control.

John
Guest

How do I ignore an ex with the no contact rule if my ex keeps asking for things back from my house or asking to bring stuff back to me?

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi JOhn,

why not bring all of her stuff back to her at once and tell her let your stuff be for now because at the moment you don’t need them..

jake
Guest
hey, I’ve dated my ex for almost 2 years. I was so terrible in these 2 years, she tried to broke up with me several times but she loves me so she couldn’t. about month she finally decides to move on with her life and then she broke up with me. there was a guy out there pretend to love her… after about a week she gets into the new affair with that guy and got him as her new boyfriend. I tried to improve myself and in fact, I could. I tried NC for about 2 weeks then send… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Jake,
You have to restart nc.. She has to think you’re not chasing her and just being friendly when you’re talking again..

Brandon
Guest
I have this girl that I have been dating for a year and a half and she cheated on me twice but the longer our relationship went through those things faded away. And just recently she got pregnant with me and then had a miscarriage and she said that she decided to move on with her life and is now dating someone else from her job. I tried the NC rule but then that only gave them time together. I gave it two weeks and at the end of that time she started dating him. And now I’m also blocked… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Brandon,

How active are you improving yoirself? Why did she block you? Did you reach out?

Mike
Guest
Hello, I would really appreciate some insight and advice…. My girlfriend and I (both 20 years old) mutually split up during the end of this past August (starting our 3rd years’ of college at different colleges), after dating for over 2 and a half years. Our relationship was amazing. We never really fought(when we did they were small stupid fights like about movies and dumb stuff like that), we connected on so many levels except sexually. …I definitely have madonna whore-complex, which especially made things tougher for her over the last year of our relationship especially. But we have had… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor
Mike
Guest
Hey man, would really appreciate some insight and advice…. My girlfriend and I (both 20 years old) mutually split up during the end of this past August (starting our 3rd years’ of college at different colleges), after dating for over 2 and a half years. Our relationship was amazing. We never really fought(when we did they were small stupid fights like about movies and dumb stuff like that), we connected on so many levels except sexually. …I definitely have madonna whore-complex, which especially made things tougher for her over the last year of our relationship especially. But we have had… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor
Kevin
Guest
Hi, I’ve read through multiple pages on this website that all seem to have part of my current situation addressed. This seems so complicated for me, I just want a game plan and to k ow if I’m heading in the right direction. Me and my girlfriend of 2 and a half years had a mutual breakup back in September. Me and her are living in her home country, Japan and I’m from America. We both thought that I was going to have to leave Japan at the end of this year but an unexpected injury that I got extended… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Kevin,

the more desperate you are the more you’ll push her away..focus in your nc, in improving yourself and in posting.

Chris
Guest
Ok, so my situation is pretty grim. I’m a student in college (20) and so is my ex. (19). We were together for an entire year before she stated that she just didn’t think we could work anymore. We used to spend every waking moment together. Now we’ve been apart for three months and she went back to her ex a month ago. This guy is a real piece of shit who is manipulative and even used me to get information about our breakup by pretending like he wanted to help when in reality he was already dating her by… Read more »
Chris
Guest

Btw, I tried no contact and it seemed succesful, but she barely seemed phased by the fact that I was out of the picture despite what some of her friends say.

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Chris,

how long did you do nc, what were the improvements you did, and how active were you in posting then and now?

Ryan
Guest
here’s my problem, I did no contact for 2 months, I got her to unblock me by getting a friend to talk her and i started talking to her for 2 months basically. I didn’t know how to move an further tho I couldn’t think of any ways for her and I to get together and hang until now. But i talked to that same friend and he confirmed she has still been dating this guy for 4 months now and she talked about me to him and she considers me just a friend. I’m gonna go ahead and do… Read more »
Ryan
Guest

to add some background this is the guy she dumped me for and she and I dated for 8 months.

Ryan
Guest

And what I was planning to do was to ask her to make cake for my friends birthday she works at an ice cream place that makes cakes. I was gonna possibly chat her up but I don’t know if that’s best at this point. And I don’t even know what I should say. Should I make a casual apology, should I try to talk friendly but risk of solidifying this friendzone?

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Ryan,

don’t apologize.. that’s just going to make you more friendzoned.. are you also always there for her? are you dating anybody else now?

Ryan
Guest
Ok, I won’t apologize and no she really hasn’t opened up to me emotionally at all and I’m not dating anyone right now. Normally I’m the one who starts the convo and I keep normally about stuff of mutual interest. I haven’t really brought up much about our past relationship though. I did about a small thing but she didn’t even seem to notice or care. She’s never even brought up that she’s dating the same guy still. I going to go pick up the cake tomorrow I might just keep the convo short and suggest that she should ask… Read more »
Ryan
Guest

I actually was originally going to ask her to the movies with my friends and I this weekend (she doesn’t know these people) but she’s said before vaguely she always out of town on the weekends. I’m guessing to see the guy so that would probably be her excuse.

Ryan
Guest
So i didn’t get to see her at her work she wasn’t there when i went to pick up the cake. But I decided to bring up the movies that i was gonna see with my friends she first responded really fast and seemed interested and then I asked if she wanted to come along and she then asked for what day. I told her then after like an hour she said “Im out of town on Fridays but thanks for the invite” I responded with alright maybe next time. Now I don’t know what to think of that she… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

nope, just keep building rapport through text and calls first.. It’s ok to start a conversation, what’s more important is you’re the one ending it at high point.

Ryan
Guest

I’m having a hard time with figuring out this finding the high point and ending it. Several of our conversations have not been extremely long ( maybe 8-10 texts back and fourth) and she doesn’t respond that quickly normally. Which I think is what throws off this finding the high point. Sometimes she will take 20+ min to respond in the middle of our conversation, sometimes quicker. When she is taking time to respond do I still just try to end it?

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

When you’ve reached the fun part of the conversation or when you’ve given the climax of your story, end it after that..

John
Guest
Hi, I could use some advice about the situation I’m in. My girlfriend broke up with me a month ago; we had been together for almost five months. The mixed signals she had been sending throughout the relationship are what is making me doubt whether it is worth to give it another try. In fact, we got together quite impulsively, without having built up a friendship first. At that time, even though she said she wasn’t planning on getting into a serious relationship, it was her who rushed into things – staying at my place pretty much every day, planning… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi John,

why not try the no contact rule?

Mike
Guest
Hey, I’d like to have some advice. I broke up with my ex 10 months ago and we were together for 7 months, we lost contact for a while and we started back when i found out she’s dating with this guy which is my friend. They seemed close and i confessed back my feelings towards her as i don’t want to lose her away with the new guy. She told me that she’s confused as the new guy confessed to her beforehand too! I made a huge mistake by forcing her to choose between me and him. She choose… Read more »
Mike
Guest
A lot of thoughts was running on my mind when she told me she decided to be with him. I couldn’t focus on my studies and exams, it’s just her running on my mind all day and thinking how to get her back. She told me that if it is going to happen where we will be back together, it will be and to go with the flow. She also told me to go on with my life with no regrets and do not think about it and just go with the flow. It seems like she’s given up on… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Mike,

Did you tell about nc and not talking to her for 30 days?

Mike
Guest
Yea i did as i desperately need a break to heal myself. She came over to my place yesterday, had some great time. I cooked for her and we watched movies in the house together. It was very good, like as if we were back together. She still keep my photos and her lock screen is still my birth date. I was very happy during that but when she was about to leave, she told me that this is her last time coming over. Well of course i was sad, but i did not show it and instead respected her… Read more »
Mike
Guest

Yea i did

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

That means you to make it 45 days.. Because she can’t know that you’re doing nc..

Mike
Guest

Wouldn’t doing a complete NC will make her forget me? Wouldn’t she thought that i had moved on? She wanted me to move on anyway but i doesn’t want to

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

That’s good if she thinks you’ve moved on.. that means you’re not chasing her.. and then you can start rebuilding rapport and attraction from there.

Jake
Guest
My girlfriend and I broke up 1 month and 8 days ago. We were together for 8 months. I met her through a friend. We broke up for 2 weeks in the past but worked through it. She started college in August and made new friends there, but she’s only a short drive away. I’m friends with her best friend. The breakup was fairly amicable, in that she used the normal “it’s not you it’s me” routine. She jumped directly into a relationship with one of her new friends after she dumped me, I’m assuming she left me for him.… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Jake,

How long did you do nc?

Theodor
Guest
Hi.Me and my ex girfriend started dating after she came into my class. In the first dat of school she started being also my deskmate.At the begining we were ok . Then I moved to the next level and asked her to hang out after classes .From that moment to now , me and her were always thogheter after school every single day .We had a nice relationship and I was feeling great .But last week she became cold.with me.Nothing was the same . And then , yesterday she tild me that she is so cold because someone from her… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Theodore,

Are you still in nc now?

Byron
Guest
Hi Amor, Thank you so much for these guides. I have just stumbled upon them. It’s very heartening to see you being so committed to replying as well. So here’s my situation with my ex. I met her one February. She lived three hours hours and I didn’t see her until the summer when we spent a weekend together. Then I didn’t see her until December, at which point she asked me out and told me she had been wanting to date me since she met me. We spent about 5 days together in January and a month later she… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Byron,

Restart nc.. Stick to at least 30 days and check this one:
The Ultimate Guide To Getting A Long Distance Relationship Ex Girlfriend Back

Jeff
Guest
Hi. I have a question. My girlfriend and I broke up after being together for 2 years. She is now with a new guy right when we broke up. He was her friend first but obviously she got her emotional support from him instead of me. She broke up with me but she says she still cares about me very much and that we can be friends. We have been broken up now for the past month and I havnt done no contact yet. We text every once in awhile, and I’m still a part of her son’s life like… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Jeff,

Try nc firs, be active in improving yourself and in posting

Mike
Guest

Hey Chris,

Amazing advice thanks.

I managed to get in a situation where I was able to offer my ex emotional support fairly quickly and got a thank you for being there message. However, one of the reasons she got frustrated with me in our relationship was the fact I seemed to ignore her messages at times or wouldnt have time for her… is it still correct to leave her waiting when replying to her if this was previous issue?

Thanks

Mike

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Mike,

Just dont make her wait too long and dont do it to all your replies

AL
Guest

My ex and I are in the same in a school project which means I can see her everyday and we have to see each other to make this project. I can only do the NC on weekends. What should I do?

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor
AL
Guest

I can see my ex everyday and we had a project and we’re on the same group. How do I do the NC?

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor
Christopher
Guest
Hi – My ex and i were long distance. An hour flight apart. We dated for a year and a half. We spoke about marriage. I broke up with her out of the blue but then kept talking to her and seeing her. I then stopped speaking with her for a few weeks. I woke up one day and realized i made a terrible mistake. I texted and called her and she said it was over and time to move on. I got emotional and started texting how much i loved her and sent her pics of us, etc. I… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Christopher,

Do you want to try the advice above? Are you actively improving yourself?

Mario
Guest
Hi, My ex girlfriend and I broke up in May 2017; because I found out she was seeing this doctor who stayed close her workplace. Well, I found out all of this on her phone. She denied it at first and we quarrelled about it. We later reconciled and decided to let it go. After awhile I noticed she still was chatting this guy late at night when she told me she wanted help with some information on her phone. I then checked to see if she was still seeing this guy. Well she was. I confronted her and we… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor
Eric
Guest
I wrote to you before about an ex with a new boyfriend. I’ve taken things really slow and she is talking to me again through text now. She has shared some of her feelings about stresses at school and such. I tried the waiting 60 minutes to a highly emotional high word count text. It seems that when we do text she responds quickly and it’s 50/50 split. I’ve avoided the past relationship, we don’t fight, and I try to always end it first. I’ve used harmony, conformity, and accord texts. But it seems like, she won’t let me build… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi Eric,

How long have you been building rapport? Because it would really take a long time if she is in a relationship, especially like yours that it looks like she has already moved on

Relhan
Guest
Hi Amor You obviously know the state of mind men are if they are seeking help I was the one who initiated the breakup as I needed time to commit to marriage but she was getting hurt But been 1.5 months couldn’t get her out of my head and things became clear that I was ready I called her but she didn’t answer and I got a text message that she has moved on and seeing someone else This is where the bomb got dropped on me I used a bit a stalking tools and found out it’s a rebound… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Hi,
Make it seem like you’re moving on through your posts..so that she doesn’t think you’re chasing her when you initiate contact after nc

Xander
Guest

I think my comments keep disappearing.. Can anyone help?

Xander
Guest

Please.. I appreciate your advice regarding my situation now.. I feel so lost

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

If they only talked after the break up, yes the guy is a rebound. Check this one:
The Three Things You Need To Have To Get A Long Distance Girlfriend Back (Video)

Xander
Guest

I made mistake after break up being clingy and begging.. So I started NC.. After 2days she unblocked me and chat me, she seems nice. I’ve just seen it and I didn’t reply.. How long should I complete NC? Tnx.

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

do at least 30 days

Xander
Guest

I appreciate your response, its been 10days since I initiated NC.. I saw some picture of them her rebound guy on social media. These past few days she continue chating on me and I didn’t reply at all while improving myself and being active in posting, she seems nice but sometimes not when she chat on me. Is that normal? Is that ok I just seen her chat? What shoud I do? My situation is hard, she’s working in other country. I appreciate you help. Thanks..

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

That’s good that you’re not replying. Stick to no contact rule and in being active in improving and in posting.

Xander
Guest

In my case, do you think their 1 and a half months rebound relationship would last? tnx..

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

that’s still short.. it still has a chance of not succeeding

Xander
Guest

Thanks for the response. She still keeps chat on me and sending picture of some of our stuffs 11days since NC period and I just ignored them. Now she’s posting about he’s new guy and seems enjoying. How about that? I mean Is she really mean that? Sorry Im just confused. Thanks.

EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

Just let her be.. Dont watch her posts..let her to be the one thinking about your posts

Xander
Guest
Thanks Amor, now its been 16 days since I initiated NC, I didn’t reply at all and it made her angry and upset these few days. Yesterday she sent picture of our engagement ring and her chat became emotional. She blocked me again in FB. What does it mean? Her sister asked me where I am. Is that some sign of she want us back again? I’m confused ‘coz if she’s still dating w/ d other guy (rebound) I mean what should I do do I need to complete 21 days NC? Will she unblocked me again? I think she… Read more »
EGR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EGR Team Member: Amor

That’s good she’s misses you.. Are you still in nc now?

Xander
Guest
Thanks Amor, Yes I’m still in NC for 28days, while being active in posting and improving myself. After a few days after she unblocked me, she posted thier picture of her new guy being together. She already introduce this guy to her mother and I confront her sister about this, she said they are shock and sad about what’s happening. I told her not to say it to her sister that i’m asking about her. I think it’s too fast and too soon and i think she’s pretending that it is a long term relationship? She’s Pretending to be happy.… Read more »