If you’ve arrived at this article I’m willing to bet that you are still interned in your ex girlfriend. You may have broken up with her and are now regretting it. Or, perhaps she ended it with you and you really miss her and want her back. Heck, maybe you are just terrified she will find someone new.
First of all, I want to assure you that you have arrived at the very best place. By the time you are finished reading this article, I want you to be an expert on your ex girlfriend and when she misses you and what you can do about it.
After a breakup, it is only natural to crave that your ex misses you. After all, if your ex misses you, you know that you made an impact on their life. You may be wanting to see the words “I miss you” appear on your phone screen, so much so that you are checking for a text throughout the day.
However, if those words are not coming, you may be looking for some reassurance that your ex girlfriend misses you. Or worse, you may be left wondering when in the world she will start to miss you.
Does My Ex Girlfriend Miss Me at All?
I want to kick this article off with some great news for you.
Really, I think this is news that is going to get you really excited.
I can almost guarantee you that your ex girlfriend misses you.
How do I know this?
Well, first of all, I’m a girl and I like to think I know things about girls.
Second of all, I am lucky enough to help moderate EBR. You see, EBR (Ex Boyfriend Recovery) is almost exactly like this webpage, except, it is geared towards women who are trying to get their ex boyfriends back. In my experience on EBR, I can tell you that almost every woman expresses missing her ex boyfriend. I’m talking women of all ages, women who are in new relationships, women who have ex boyfriends that did some really bad stuff. Yep. Almost every single woman.
Now, I’m assuming if you’ve arrived at this article you have probably been wondering if your ex girlfriend misses you for a while or it is weighing pretty heavily on your mind.
So, if you’re still not convinced that your ex girlfriend misses you then, I’m going to offer you one more piece of evidence.
I surveyed 10 girls randomly. I asked them two questions:
- Question 1: Do you miss your most recent ex boyfriend?
- Question 2: Do you miss an ex boyfriend you’ve been broken up with for more than 3 years?
I’m going to give you the results in a minute.
But first, I want to go over some parameters for these results.
I literally just asked these questions to random women at Starbucks. I know nothing about them, other than they go to Starbucks, but more importantly, I know nothing about their past relationships or dating history. One woman was even married, so you can probably guess her responses. Keep this in the back of your mind though.
Now for the results:
For Question 1: Do you miss your most recent ex boyfriend?
7 out of the 10 women said yes!
Question 2: Do you miss an ex boyfriend you’ve been broken up with for more than 3 years?
3 out of the 10 women said yes!
Now, let’s talk about what this means. If your breakup is still pretty new, I would say there is a 70% chance or higher that your ex girlfriend misses you. Even after 3 whole years of not dating her, there is still a 30% chance that your ex girlfriend misses you.
This is of course not the “most scientific” of experiments, but you get the point.
There is a lot of missing going on by a lot of ex girlfriends.
Why Your Ex Girlfriend is Going to Miss You After a Breakup
Okay, so if you’re not totally blown away by the cold hard knowledge about missing that I’m throwing your way, then let’s look at this from another angle and talk about the science behind missing someone.
You see, relationships and love, function in a person’s brain like an addition. People who have studied this have done a really cool experiment where they have shown through performing fMRI’s that feelings of romantic love engage the “reward system” areas of the brain.
These are the same areas of the brain that are engaged when an addict is getting their fix.
Just admit it, you are addicted to love or your ex.
It’s okay, we all actually are.
Where the heck am I going with this??
So, we’ve established that love functions like an addiction.
Addictions are formed from habits, right?
Take a cigarette addiction, for example. The first time you pick up a cigarette, you’re probably not going to be addicted. But, if you do it again and again as a habit, this will eventually form into an addiction.
So addictions are formed from habits.
Well, here is where the cool science part comes in as it relates to your ex.
It usually takes 66 days to break a habit.
What does this have to do with anything?
If you and your ex girlfriend were together for any significant period of time. Just enough time to get the hormones flowing then just like you have become addicted to her, she has become addicted to you.
As part of this addiction, she has formed habits that revolve around you. These habits include but of course are not limited to:
- thinking about you a lot
- talking to you a lot
- doing things with you
After the breakup, she is going to have to break these habits to get over her addiction of you.
Do you see where I’m going with this?
If it takes 66 days for her to break her habits related to you and to form new ones, then you get 66 days of an almost guarantee that your ex girlfriend will be missing you.
This is great news, right!
If She Misses Me Then Why Hasn’t She Told Me Yet
However, if you’re as blow away by this information and all the missing going on, you may be left wondering “well, if she misses me, wouldn’t she tell me?”
Simply put, the answer to this is no.
There are a ton of reasons that I can think of as to why an ex girlfriend may not tell you that she misses you even when she does. I’m just going to touch on a few.
This encompasses a couple different things such as fear of rejection and fear that you may have moved on. This is probably the most popular category I would say that women fall into. Whatever her specific fear is that is keeping her back, she just doesn’t feel comfortable saying that she misses you yet.
2. Not the Right Time
Ugh, women and our “timing.” Here’s another popular one. She may be really wanting to tell you but she’s waiting for the “right time” or “when it feels right.” I myself, have fallen into this category plenty of times. Maybe she wants to feel more confident or wants to wait until she’s less emotional. Whatever the specific reason is, she just doesn’t want to say it yet, but this doesn’t mean that she doesn’t feel it.
3. She’s Unsure If She Made The Right Decision
Here is an interesting dilemma. Let’s say that she broke up with you. After a few days or weeks go by, maybe she is missing you. However, at the same time, she’s also starting to adjust to her single life. At this point, she may be unsure if she made the right decision breakup up with you and is trying to figure that out first before reaching out.
4. She’s Trying To Move On
This is probably the worst case scenario. Similar to the above, perhaps she realizes that she misses you but in this case she is certain that she wants to try to move on and for that reason she doesn’t want to open up old wounds. You got to give it to her, this does make sense. However, even if she is trying to move on, you still have a chance to get her back. So, if your ex falls into this category, not all hope is lost.
How to Make Your Ex Girlfriend Miss You After a Breakup
Now that we’ve established that she will miss you, you may be wondering what you can do to make her miss you more or to make her miss you faster.
Well my friend, keep on reading because I am going to give you 3 Strategies To Make Her Miss You Like Crazy and Crazy Fast!
Some of these strategies may seem a little counter-intuitive at first, but I promise you, they will work! These strategies may also have your girlfriend thinking about you more and more, so it is very key that you do your best to stick to them.
Without any further delay, I give you:
3 Strategies To Make Her Miss You Like Crazy and Crazy Fast
1. No Contact
This step is the most important. Following the breakup, you need to give her some time and space by herself. The period of No Contact and how it relates to missing someone is described in more detail in this article here: https://exgirlfriendrecovery.com/how-to-make-your-ex-girlfriend-miss-you/. Check it out after this one! This period of time will serve two purposes
1. It will be for you
You will use this time to focus on you and improve yourself. Any bad habits that may have led to the breakup, such as jealousy or neediness; well, this my friend, is your time to work on those things. By the end of this period, you want to be in a good mental state and in control of your emotions.
2. It will be for her
It will give her the time that she needs to erase any bad feelings that she has towards you or the relationship. Maybe those feelings related to your jealousy or neediness from the example above. This will also give her the opportunity to miss you.
So what do you do during the No Contact Period and how long is it? During the No Contact period, you will avoid any communication from your ex girlfriend and you will ignore any communication that she sends your way.
Let’s pause for a minute as I want to talk about one very specific scenario seeing this article is all about missing people. What if during the No Contact period she messages you “I miss you,” how do you respond?
Trick question, you do not! During the No Contact period, you do not respond to your ex girlfriend. There are very specific circumstances where you can break No Contact and those are discussed more here https://exgirlfriendrecovery.com/using-the-no-contact-rule-everything-you-need-to-know/.
2. Do Not Act As Expected
The second thing you are going to do which is really going to happen at the same time you are doing No Contact is that you are not going to act as expected. You see, you’re going to need to mix up your game a bit here. After a breakup, people are expected to act a certain way, especially the dumpee. Do not, I repeat, do not act this way.
What are some of these predictable behaviors? I think we all know what they all are:
- endless texting or calling without response or, what we here at EGR call “gnatting”
- driving by her house
- texting her friends
- posting pictures that are very obviously staged to make her jealous… yes, we know you do this
You get the picture and it’s not very pretty. All of these traits are very unattractive, so avoid them at all costs.
Instead, you want to seem okay with the breakup and as if you are trying to move on. She will wonder why you are okay when she is missing you like crazy and she may begin to question if she made a mistake.
3. Change Her Image of You With Self Improvement
Remember how we talked about above how you are going to use your No Contact Period to work on yourself? Well, this is the part where you get to show off some of your accomplishments.
If you’ve been working out a lot and are in great shape, post it. If you decided to book a trip to travel somewhere, post about it. If you decide to pick up a good new habit such as playing the guitar, post it. You get the point.
If she sees you making positive changes in your life it will be only natural for her to want to be part of those changes and to want to get to know the new you.
All of these things combined will really help to nudge her in the direction of missing you and missing you fast!
After you click out of this article there are a few things I want you to take with you. I worked really hard on this article so I want you to be successful as you move forward with your next steps.
Your ex girlfriend does miss you and it is likely that she will miss you for quite some time. There are a number of reasons why an ex girlfriend may not reach out to you to tell you she misses you but this does not mean that she does not have those kinds of feelings.
However, and this is important, following a breakup it is key that you do a No Contact period. During
this time you should not reach out to her to tell her you miss her in hope that she reciprocates. Also, if she texts you that she misses you, still wait until the end of your No Contact period. The long-term results are worth so much more than the short-term gain.
You should not fall into predictable and very unattractive behaviors after a breakup and you should post about all the self-improvement that you do during your No Contact period. These things combined should have her missing you in no time!
(Article Written By Sarah Drees)