By Chris Seiter

Published on December 31st, 2023

When an ex-girlfriend remarks that you look good, it will naturally arouse your curiosity and raise many questions. Understanding why she might say this and how to respond can offer valuable insights into how you should approach the future that you may wish to carve out with her.

Now, if you are here to grab quick piece advice, let me oblige:

An ex that says nice things about your looks can potentially be signaling various things, from genuine compliments and lingering interest to casual observation…a tease if you will. Unless you are in No Contact, respond graciously, maintaining a balance between politeness and not reading too much into it. If you’re considering rekindling things, use it as a cue to gauge her interest and plan accordingly.

Let’s explore the multifaceted reasons behind such a comment and the best ways to handle it, especially if you’re considering entering back into the relationship.

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My Ex Girlfriend Said I Looked Good: Deciphering the Compliment and Responding Strategically

When your ex-girlfriend unexpectedly compliments your appearance, saying you look good, it stirs a mix of curiosity and cautious intrigue. What’s behind her words? Is it a mere casual remark, or does it hint at something more? Let’s delve into deciphering this compliment and strategize the best way to respond to this intriguing situation.

Understanding Why She Commented on Your Appearance:

  1. Genuine Compliment:
    • It’s entirely possible that her remark was straightforward and heartfelt. She may have genuinely noticed a positive change in your appearance and felt compelled to mention it, with no ulterior motive.
  2. Indicating Interest:
    • Complimenting your looks could be a subtle signal of her ongoing interest. This might be particularly true if she emphasizes the change in a way that’s flirty or laden with deeper meaning, indicating she’s still emotionally invested in some way.
  3. Testing the Waters:
    • Her comment could be a strategic move to gauge your reaction, which is especially likely if there’s been some ambiguity about your feelings post-breakup. It can be a low-risk way for her to see if there’s still a spark or potential for re-connection.
  4. Acknowledging Your Efforts:
    • If you’ve been putting effort into self-improvement, whether it’s hitting the gym, updating your wardrobe, or just taking better care of yourself, she might be acknowledging these positive changes. It’s a recognition of your efforts, showing that she’s observant and appreciative of the new you.
  5. Casual Interaction:
    • The comment might simply be part of friendly, casual interaction, with no deeper implications. This is more likely if you’ve maintained a friendly rapport post-breakup and such exchanges are common between you.
  6. Stirring Jealousy:
    • On the other hand, it could be a calculated move to elicit a certain reaction, perhaps out of a desire to stir feelings of jealousy or regret. This might be the case if there are unresolved issues or a sense of competition between you two since the breakup.
  7. Reflecting on the Relationship:
    • Sometimes such comments can also stem from her reflections on the relationship and what it meant to her. Noticing your good looks could bring back memories and feelings, leading to a spontaneous compliment.

How to Respond:

Responding to a compliment from your ex-girlfriend about your appearance may require a nuanced response, especially considering the complex emotions and history involved. Here’s how you can navigate this:

  1. Acknowledge Politely:
    • A simple, confident “thank you” is often the best response. It shows that you’re gracious and self-assured, without delving into the emotional complexities of your past relationship. This acknowledgment respects the gesture without overextending the interaction.
  2. Keep it Light:
    • If you’re uncertain about her motives or if you prefer to avoid rekindling old emotions, steer the conversation towards neutral, friendly territory. A light-hearted, non-committal response can keep the interaction pleasant while guarding your emotional boundaries.
  3. Reflect Your Feelings:
    • If her comment genuinely makes you feel good or appreciated, it’s perfectly okay to express that, but with moderation. A response like, “Thanks, I appreciate that,” acknowledges her compliment while maintaining a balance in your reaction.
  4. Maintaining ‘No Contact’:
    • If you’re adhering to a no-contact rule as part of your healing process or breakup strategy, it’s important to stay true to this plan. Otherwise, acknowledge the compliment if necessary, but avoid it as a segue back into regular conversations or meetings unless her comment is part of a larger conversation the two of you have had recently.
  5. Gauge Her Body Language and Context:
    • Observing her non-verbal cues and the situation in which she gives the compliment can provide additional insights. Her tone, facial expressions, and the setting can indicate whether it’s just a casual remark or something more.
  6. Assess Your Comfort Level:
    • Consider how the interaction makes you feel. If it brings up uncomfortable emotions or memories, it’s okay to keep your response brief and move on.
  7. Respect Your Current Relationship Status:
    • If you’re in a new relationship, be mindful of how your response might be perceived by your current partner. Maintaining respect and transparency in your current relationship is key.
  8. Avoid Flirtatious Banter:
    • Unless you’re both clearly on the same page about rekindling your romance, it’s wise to avoid flirtatious or suggestive responses that could lead to misunderstandings.
  9. Use It as an Opportunity for Closure:
    • If you feel the comment brings up past issues or emotions, it might be an opportunity for a brief, honest conversation that can aid in finding closure.

Capitalizing on Her Observation:

Leveraging your ex-girlfriend’s compliment about your appearance can be a strategic move, especially if you’re contemplating get your ex back. Here’s how you can maximize this opportunity:

  1. Build on Self-Improvement:
    • Continue to invest in yourself holistically. Improving not just physically but also emotionally and mentally signifies a commitment to personal growth. This can be very appealing, showing that you’re evolving as an individual.
  2. Subtle Sharing of Your Progress:
    • If your interactions with her are comfortable and natural, you can casually mention your recent achievements or positive life changes. This doesn’t have to be boastful, but rather a sharing of how you’ve grown or what new interests you’ve pursued. It’s a way of demonstrating your progress since the breakup.
  3. Flirtation, If Appropriate:
    • Gauge her interest and response. If she seems receptive and you feel a mutual spark, some light, playful flirtation can help rekindle the romantic vibe. However, be mindful to keep it respectful and not too forward.
  4. Invite to Catch Up:
    • Utilize her compliment as a segue to suggest a casual catch-up. This could be for coffee or a walk, something low-key that allows you both to reconnect and see where things stand in a relaxed environment.
  5. Use Social Media Wisely:
    • Your online presence can be a powerful tool. Share updates about your life that reflect your positive changes and new experiences. If she’s already noticing you physically, seeing your positive lifestyle and mindset on social media can reinforce her attraction.
  6. Stay Confident and Positive:
    • Confidence, coupled with a positive outlook, is highly attractive. Respond to her compliment with a mix of gratitude and self-assurance. Let your interactions be marked by a positive and upbeat demeanor.
  7. Respect Her Boundaries:
    • While leveraging her observation, always be mindful of her comfort and boundaries. Ensure that your actions are considerate of her feelings and receptive to her responses.
  8. Create an Atmosphere of Mystery:
    • Sometimes, leaving a bit of mystery about your life post-breakup can pique her interest. Share enough to intrigue her but keep some things under wraps to encourage her curiosity.
  9. Be Genuine:
    • Above all, ensure that your actions and words are genuine. Authenticity is key in any interaction, especially in potentially restarting a relationship.

The Expert’s Corner

Insider Insights From Chris Seiter: 10 FAQs Regarding the Topic “My Ex Said I Looked Good”

  1. What does it mean when my ex says I look good?
    • It could mean several things: a simple compliment, an expression of lingering feelings, or admiration for your self-improvement. It’s important to consider the context of your relationship and her tone to understand her intentions better.
  2. Should I read into my ex’s comment about my appearance?
    • It’s natural to wonder, but be cautious about over-analyzing. It could be a casual remark without deeper implications. Reflect on your past interactions and her current demeanor to gauge if it’s more than just a compliment.
  3. How should I respond when my ex compliments my appearance?
    • A polite thank you is usually appropriate, unless of course you are in the midst of your No Contact period. It acknowledges her compliment without leading the conversation into potentially complicated emotional territory, especially if you’re unsure about her intentions.
  4. Could this be a sign that my ex wants to get back together?
    • While it could be a sign, it’s not definitive. Compliments can be part of friendly exchanges and don’t necessarily indicate a desire to rekindle the relationship. Look for other signs of renewed interest before jumping to conclusions.
  5. What if I’m still interested in my ex and she says I look good?
    • If you’re interested in rekindling things and she compliments you, consider it a positive interaction. You can use this as an opportunity to engage in a light conversation, but be careful not to be too forward too soon. But again, don’t forget to stay true to your No Contact period if it is still ongoing.
  6. How do I know if my ex is just being polite or actually means the compliment?
    • Assess her body language and the context. If she seems genuine and possibly shows other signs of interest, she might mean it. However, if it’s said in passing or during a casual conversation, it could just be politeness.
  7. Is it okay to compliment her back?
    • If it feels natural and appropriate in the conversation, you can return a compliment if you are not in no contact. However, ensure that it is genuine and not forced, keeping the interaction respectful and considerate.
  8. What if the compliment from my ex makes me uncomfortable?
    • If you’re uncomfortable, it’s okay to acknowledge the compliment briefly and then steer the conversation away. You’re not obligated to expand on it or engage further than you’re comfortable with.
  9. Should I tell my ex that her compliment made me happy?
    • If her compliment genuinely made you happy and you feel it’s appropriate to share that, you can express your appreciation. A simple “Thank you, that means a lot” can convey your feelings without overstepping boundaries.
  10. Can I use this compliment as a way to start talking to my ex again?
    • If you’re both open to communication, this could be a natural starting point for a conversation. However, proceed with caution and be mindful of both your feelings and hers. If either of you is not ready for renewed contact, it’s better to respect that space.


When your ex-girlfriend comments on your appearance, it opens a window into the current state of your relationship. Whether it’s a sign of lingering interest, a simple acknowledgment, or just a friendly compliment, your response should be measured, respectful, and reflective of your intentions.

If you’re working towards getting back together, use this opportunity to demonstrate your positive changes while maintaining the delicate balance of not coming on too strong.

Don’t stray away from the Game Plan your Breakup Coach helped you with.


Disclosure: I am the Author and Creator of this content. My aim is to provide you with original, well structured and authoritative content about this ex recovery topic utilizing my experience and expertise. I have endeavored to produce content that is high quality, relevant, informative, accurate, and reliable. In doing so, I have used an AI tool to some extent to assist me in generating useful content for my readers. This assistance may include topic research, the development of outline structures, phraseology for titles and headings, content curation, narrative expansion, grammar usage, and optimizing readability. All of this is done for the purpose of adding value to the post that I have produced. I personally “proof” every quality post I write for accuracy, completeness, textual flow, fine-tuning purposes, inclusion of relevant media, and inclusion of helpful internal links to further assist the reader. I do not allow for any 3rd party advertising that would muddy up my content or distract my readers.

Signed By Yours Truly, Chris Seiter, Founder of Ex Boyfriend & Ex Girlfriend Recovery.	

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