By Chris Seiter

Published on December 31st, 2023

Getting through a breakup can often feel like trying to read a book with half the pages missing. You might find yourself analyzing every interaction, trying to decipher whether your ex-girlfriend is showing signs of wanting to come back. And none of it crystal clear as you are left with trying to make sense of subtle cues and signs that your ex is giving out.

Here are 12 subtle signs that your ex might signal her readiness to return to you, coupled with strategic game plans depending on the signs you’re receiving.  I also will provide a word of caution about misreading these signals.

While they may apply for your situation, I strongly encourage you to incorporate these Game Plan tactics in your larger Recovery Game Plan that you formed as a result of completing the Ex Recovery Program or obtained from your Breakup Coach.

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12 Subtle Signs Your Ex Girlfriend Will Eventually Come Back

1. She Maintains Contact After the Breakup:

  • If she initiates contact regularly, it’s a sign she’s not ready to let go entirely. This could be through texts, calls, or even liking your social media posts.
  • Game Plan: Be responsive but don’t over-initiate. Maintain a balance of friendly yet detached communication. This encourages her without making you seem too eager.

2. She Brings Up Positive Memories:

3. She Asks About Your Well-being:

  • Genuine concern about your life post-breakup is a clear sign she still cares. This could be her asking friends about you or directly inquiring about your job, family, or hobbies.
  • Game Plan: Share updates that show you’re doing well but also that you miss having her in your life. It’s a way of subtly showing her that life is better with her in it.

4. She Keeps Your Belongings:

5. She’s Jealous of Your Dating Life:

  • Signs of jealousy, like asking about your dating status or seeming upset when you mention someone else, indicate she’s not ready to see you move on.
  • Game Plan: Be honest but vague about your dating life. Let her know you haven’t found someone who compares to her, suggesting you’re still open to reconciliation.

6. She’s Improved Herself:

  • Noticing she’s working on herself, be it personal or professional growth, could be an effort to become better for you.
  • Game Plan: Compliment her growth and share your improvements. This mutual recognition can create a bridge back to each other.

7. She Stays in Touch with Your Friends and Family:

8. She Talks About Changes or Mistakes:

  • If she reflects on what could have been done differently or admits mistakes, it’s a sign she’s reconsidering the breakup.
  • Game Plan: Engage in these conversations by acknowledging past mistakes and discussing potential changes. It shows maturity and readiness for a new start.

9. She’s Open About Her Single Status:

  • Making sure you know she’s still single might be a way to tell you she’s not moving on yet.
  • Game Plan: Don’t rush to ask her out. Show her you’re also taking your time, making the idea of getting back together more appealing.

10. She Reacts Positively to Contact: – If she responds well to your communication, be it a laugh at your jokes or a quick reply to your texts, it’s a good sign. – Game Plan: Slowly increase the frequency of your communication. Gauge her reactions and proceed accordingly.

11. She Talks About the Future: – If she makes references to future events or scenarios involving you both, it’s a subtle hint she sees a potential reunion. – Game Plan: Talk about future plans but include her indirectly. This can plant the idea of a shared future in her mind.

12. She Hasn’t Returned Your Key: – Keeping something as significant as a key suggests she’s not ready to close the door on your relationship. – Game Plan: Don’t rush to get the key back. Instead, use it as a metaphor in conversations about giving each other another chance.

The Problem of Misreading Signs From Your Ex

Properly interpreting signals from an ex-girlfriend is a task that requires a bit of instinct (after all you do know her best) and emotional intelligence. Misreading these signs is a common pitfall, especially when your heart is involved. Let’s dive deeper into how to avoid these misinterpretations:

1. Look for Patterns:

  • Consistency is key. A single message or gesture shouldn’t be taken as a definite sign. If she’s consistently reaching out, showing interest, or making an effort to be around you, these are stronger indicators than a one-time text or encounter.
  • Evaluate the Context: Consider the situations in which she reaches out. Is it only late at night, when she’s feeling lonely? Or is it across various contexts, indicating a genuine desire to reconnect?

2. Seek Neutral Opinions:

  • Friends or family members can offer a different viewpoint. They can help distinguish wishful thinking from reality. Choose someone who knows both of you and can provide honest, unbiased feedback.
  • Be Open to Feedback: It’s essential to be receptive to what they have to say, even if it’s not what you want to hear. They might notice things you’re overlooking due to emotional bias. But be aware that family and friends can be way off the mark.

3. Stay Grounded:

  • Emotions can cloud judgment. Remind yourself to take a step back and look at the situation objectively. Don’t let a moment of nostalgia or a surge of emotion sway your understanding of the entire relationship.
  • Balance Hope with Realism: It’s okay to hope for reconciliation, but this shouldn’t overshadow a realistic assessment of the likelihood and the healthiness of getting back together.

4. Consider Her Personality:

  • People’s inherent traits can sometimes be mistaken for specific intentions. If she’s naturally caring or sociable, she might simply be acting in accordance with her personality, not necessarily signaling a desire to reunite.
  • Reflect on Past Interactions: Think about how she behaved in the relationship. Is her current behavior a significant departure from how she usually acts, or is it in line with her typical character?

5. Don’t Over-Analyze:

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  • It’s easy to fall into the trap of overthinking every small interaction. Not every ‘like’ on social media or friendly text warrants a deeper interpretation.
  • Keep Things Simple: Take her actions at face value. If she wants to come back, look for clear and unambiguous signs. Subtleties can often be misleading.

6. Be Wary of Projection:

  • Sometimes, what you interpret as signs could be a projection of your own feelings and desires. Check if you’re seeing signs because you want them to be there.
  • Self-Reflection: Spend time understanding your feelings and desires. Are you interpreting her actions based on what you hope for, or are they genuinely indicative of her wanting to return?

7. Gauge the Level of Effort:

  • The amount of effort she puts into reconnecting can also be a telltale sign. Casual interactions may not mean much, but more deliberate efforts, like planning to meet or discussing important matters, could be more significant.
  • Evaluate Mutual Investment: Are both of you equally invested in these interactions, or is it one-sided? Balanced effort from both sides is a more reliable indicator of potential reconciliation.

The Expert’s Corner

Insider Insights From Chris Seiter: 10 FAQs About Deciphering If Your Ex-girlfriend Wants You Back

  1. How can I tell if my ex-girlfriend’s increased social media activity is meant for me?
    • Look for posts that seem to reference memories or inside jokes unique to your relationship. If she’s suddenly more active after the breakup and appears to be portraying an image of someone you’d be attracted to, it could be for your benefit.
  2. What does it mean if she’s always at social events I attend?
    • If she knows your schedule and seems to be at events she normally wouldn’t attend, especially if she makes an effort to interact with you, it could be a sign she wants to stay in your orbit and perhaps rekindle things.
  3. Should I respond to casual texts from my ex?
    • Yes, but keep it light and friendly. Gauge the nature of her texts – if they’re nostalgic or flirty, it may indicate she’s interested in reconnecting. However, don’t read too much into polite or generic messages.
  4. Why would she reminisce about our relationship?
    • Bringing up happy memories can be her way of reminding you of the good times and what you’re missing. It’s often a subtle method to reignite old feelings.
  5. Is her jealousy a sign she wants to get back together?
    • Jealousy often indicates lingering feelings. If she seems bothered about your dating life or reacts negatively to you moving on, it suggests she’s not over you.
  6. How significant is it if she keeps in touch with my friends and family?
    • Maintaining these connections can mean she’s reluctant to fully exit your life. It might be her way of keeping a link to you, hoping to re-enter your world.
  7. What if she talks about her regrets regarding our breakup?
    • This could be a sign of her reflecting on what went wrong and considering a second chance. She might be hoping for forgiveness or showing she’s learned from her mistakes.
  8. How should I interpret her making sure I know she’s still single?
    • This could be a tactic to make sure you know she’s available. She might be hinting that she’s not moved on and is open to rekindling your relationship.
  9. Is it a good sign if she’s always happy to hear from me?
    • Positive reactions to your contact are promising. If she’s quick to respond, engages in lengthy conversations, or seems genuinely happy to hear from you, it might be a sign she’s interested in more than just friendship.
  10. What if she still has something important of mine but hasn’t returned it?


Making sense of whether your ex-girlfriend wants to come back is a complex process that requires patience, insight, and a bit of strategy. While these signs can be promising, they should be considered collectively and cautiously.

Follow your game plan, but stay flexible and responsive to the situation as it evolves.

Remember, a healthy relationship should be based on clear communication and mutual understanding. If you’re considering a reunion, make sure it’s for the right reasons and that both of you are willing to work on the issues that led to the breakup.



Disclosure: I am the Author and Creator of this content. My aim is to provide you with original, well structured and authoritative content about this ex recovery topic utilizing my experience and expertise. I have endeavored to produce content that is high quality, relevant, informative, accurate, and reliable. In doing so, I have used an AI tool to some extent to assist me in generating useful content for my readers. This assistance may include topic research, the development of outline structures, phraseology for titles and headings, content curation, narrative expansion, grammar usage, and optimizing readability. All of this is done for the purpose of adding value to the post that I have produced. I personally “proof” every quality post I write for accuracy, completeness, textual flow, fine-tuning purposes, inclusion of relevant media, and inclusion of helpful internal links to further assist the reader. I do not allow for any 3rd party advertising that would muddy up my content or distract my readers.

Signed By Yours Truly, Chris Seiter, Founder of Ex Boyfriend & Ex Girlfriend Recovery.	

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